Nothing left to lose
by keniakittykat
Summary: When Sonic ends up in a hospital after saving the world once again, his injuries cause him to lose both his speed and slowly his sanity as well. .:Becomes more intense as it goes: (Multiple content warnings!)
1. Prologue: the fall

The final battle.

Preparing the last blow.

Eggman had been terrorizing this city long enough. Once again Sonic had collected the chaos emeralds and while standing on a skyscraper's rooftop in the wind and rain the emeralds circled around him and with a flash his cobalt blue fur turned golden yellow. He was ready.

Dodging the professor's weapons he was able to pierce trough his new machine with one quick blow.

Tails, who was flying near the fight to watch and send incoming status data to the gun army uttered a joyful "Yes! He did it!" while speeding closer with the tornado.

Sonic just floated there in front of his enemy for a moment before he started to feel fatigued he knew his super form wouldn't last much longer as he tried to reach the ground in time.

But it was too late, not being able to break his fall on time, he smacked his body against the pavement, his right led and backbone had to take most of the blow. Uncontentious he lay there while the robotic collosus above him started to crumble. As it fell backward some of its parts dropped down, towards the blue hedgehog.

"Eggman down, failed to escape impact, location corner of 42nd street, over." "Affirmative, we might actually get our hands on him now! Good patrolling there Tails!" Tails looked over there to see that indeed the gun soldiers had finally successfully captured the doctor. "Thanks, general, I'm going to see if I can find sonic anywhere, over and out."

Tails clicked the radio back in its place and dive landed the tornado 1 near the wreck of the robot.

He jumped out of the plane and scanned the area. The sound of sirens in the distance and the rumbling clouds above him could be heard all around, and as he inched closer he could feel shards of glass break under his feet. Then something caught his eye. It was sonic.

As fast as his legs could carry him, he ran towards him but backed away in horror by what he was witness of.

Sonic lay on his back, he was spilling blood from the corner of his mouth and his right leg was crushed underneath a heavy piece of the robot's shielding. Tails fell to his knees, next to his friend and checked his neck for a pulse. Tears of joy and fear came to his eyes as he felt a faint thumping motion on his fingertips.

He ran back to the tornado as he screamed into the radio. "Code red! Sonic is down, on the north-side of the robot. His leg is trapped under a metal plate, I can't spot any further injuries, he is uncontentious, please send help, quick!"

He went back to Sonic, who was still silently laying there. The noise of a siren came closer as the rain continued to fall...


	2. Intensive care

"The destruction to South-city was kept between limits as the diabolical Doctor Eggman was finally overmastered by our armed forces. But our biggest thanks goes out to Sonic the hedgehog, who once again prevailed to protect the world from destruction... "

Tails sat in one of the many waiting area's of the large hospital as a tv in the corner announced the latest news.

"It all takes way too long. They should've been able to save him by now. But what if they can't? What if..." Tails pulled his knees to his chest as he buried his face in his arms and began to sob.

A few minutes later he forced himself to calm down and dried his tears. "I can't be like this now, I have to be strong for Sonic. He will make it, it will be alright..."

Tails' thoughts got interrupted by a doctor walking in.

"Prower?" He asked and Tails nodded. "How is he?" He wore a weary but friendly expression on his face, and a golden tag on his white coat said "Head of IC West" . "Yes, Sonic is still with us, we've been operating all night and we've done all we could in such short time span. He woke up an hour ago, and it's you he wants to see first." Tails couldn't explain how relieved he was, Sonic's alright, and he wants to see him.

Doctor west escorted Tails to the intensive care and stopped in front of a door that had the number 38 engraved in it.

"Now then, Mister Prower, I have to warn you. Sonic is not very stable we gave him a lot of tranquilizers to cope with the pain and he lost a lot of blood. Also we had to..."

Tails didn't even want to hear the rest anymore, Sonic was alive and that's all that mattered now.

"It's ok doctor, I've heard enough, I just want to see him please." The doctor nodded and opened the door and Tails stepped inside the bright white room.

When Tails waked in he saw Sonic laying there while a nurse finished giving him another infuse.

"You're doing great, if your body stays stable like this, you'll be out of this room by tomorrow."

Sonic smiled at the nurse before a hold of his oxygen mask while closing his eyes to get comfortable.

"S...Sonic?" Tails stuttered just loud enough for sonic to hear. Sonic slowly opened his eyes and saw Tails standing there. Tails inched closer as the nurse backed away to let him pass..

"How are you feeling, Sonic?"

The hedgehog tried to shift a bit to sit up straight, but his back pains stopped him. As he dropped down a bit Tails could see that Sonic's back spines were gone. His upper body was wrapped in bandages and 3 different tubes were pumping strangely colored fluids into his wrists and neck.

He took the oxygen mask off and smiled at Tails. "Well, heh, looks like I've been roughed up good this time." His words slanted out of his mouth like he was drunk. His eyes were bloodshot and he sort of squirmed a little. It hurt Tails to see him drugged up like this. He scanned Sonic's body up and down and suddenly he spotted something horrific.

In one of his twitches, he lifted his right leg up... but Tails couldn't make out his foot. And when the leg hit the mattress, trapping some of the white sheet under it, his fears were confirmed; Sonic lost a leg.

Tails figured he didn't even know his leg was gone yet. "Yeah, but don't worry, you'll survive this."

Sonic chuckled. "Sure thing buddy, thank you for coming..." Sonic wanted to say more, but he was simply too tired. The nurse picked up on this and decided it was time for him to rest.

"When can I come back?" Tails asked. The nurse checked her watch and the notes on her clipboard.

"Can't tell, but if you leave your number at the desk, we'll be able to call you when he's ready to see visitors."

Tails agreed with this and left.


	3. the hospital stay: some bad news

He decided to stay at a small cheap hotel just a few blocks away from the hospital, so he was close just in case something came up.

That night he received a phone-call from the hospital telling him that Sonic would be transferred to a private room and that Tails was expected to be there the next day at 12.30 sharp so the orthopedic could share the details of Sonic's condition.

"Thank you so much, but, can you tell me why I'm the only one who can see Sonic yet?"

"Hmm, Well, it seems that Sonic only confirmed you as a close relative." Tails got tears in his eyes and a crop in his throat, Sonic actually told them that he was a relative?

He thanked the lady on the other end of the line and hung up.

The next day Tails arrived at Sonic's new hospital room, he knocked on the door and hear Sonic's cheerful self say "Come in."

He walked in and saw Sonic laying on the clear white bedding. He looked a lot better and sounded a lot clearer. His face lit up as he saw it was Tails that entered the room.

"Tails! yeah, I'd love to get up but since I tried to get up a few times yesterday and last night, they've forbidden me to do so."

Sonic's playful comment and expression caused Tails to giggle a little. He was relieved everything was alright.

The only thing that was the same was that he was still infused with three plastic tubes.

"Well, how can they forbid you to get up?" Tails asked. "Well, they just lowered my morphine doses, if I want to get up the pain will stop me. But as long as I don't get up I won't be in any pain." Sonic declared. "That, and they cut off my back quills so my back can lay straight."

He was getting better but Tails could still hear the hint of slur in his voice as he pulled up a chair, and he wondered when it would sink trough about his leg.

The fox's thoughts got interrupted by The orthopedic walking in. "Hey, doc' how am I doing?" Sonic asked happily.

"I must say I've never seem someone in your condition with so much optimism and strength. But I may have some information that may ruin your mood to say the least..."

Sonic and Tails looked at each other in confusion for a split second. "What do you mean doctor?"

"Well, let me start to say that you are extremely lucky to still be alive. Your chances of survival were an estimated 39 percent. You lost almost a liter of blood, which is much for someone your size and age."

Sonic indeed was a medical wonder, this he knew.

"Your fall shattered three of the five lumbar columns in the lower part of your spine; we already took the shattered pieces out and we've implanted some temporary use metal parts to keep it sturdy, for now. We will have to replace them with the finished implants fairly soon."

Sonic looked down at where his leg used to be.

"Man, this is going to take a long time to heal... But don't worry Tails, we'll be running together again soon." Neither the doctor nor Tails said anything...

"I mean, they can replace my leg, right? Not like a prosthetic leg will ever replace it, but still, I will be able to run again, right?" … "Right?"

Sonic was starting to get angry, why wasn't anyone telling him anything?

"Well, Your leg isn't your biggest concern right now. The problem is that your back won't ever be strong enough to support your upper body anymore."

These words were like a knife, stabbed in Sonic's heart. He would never be able to run again...


	4. the hospital stay: 10 long hours

In the following weeks Sonic would sink deeper, and deeper.

The day of his surgery came closer and Sonic was prepared for that day as every one of his friends had already come to pay a visit. But Sonic was unable to lighten up.

On one of those evenings where Tails would just sit next to him in silence, not an awkward silence, but there just wasn't any need for things to be said...

Tails was looking out of the window, the orange glow of the setting sun seemed to set the sky ablaze.

It was beautiful.

Suddenly he felt Sonic taking his hand. He turned his head, but Sonic's gaze was focused out the window.

"Tomorrow is the surgery..." Sonic said silently.

Tails nodded, while looking at his embraced hand. "I know..." he uttered.

He suddenly felt the grip on his hand increasing and noticed sonic was shaking.

"I'm scared..." Sonic whispered while holding back tears.

This was something new for Tails. He'd never seen him scared before, and even then, Sonic would never admit it.

"I'm afraid I might die this time, Tails, They told me how risky it is, and I can't believe that after everything I've been trough this is what stops me..." Sonic started to sniffle as he was unable to hold the tears back any longer. Tails tightened the grip on his brother's hand. He didn't know what else to say or do.

It was nine am the next morning when they wheeled Sonic to the operating room and Tails walked beside him.

Inside the room they did one final check before covering Sonic's mouth and nose with an anesthetic's mask. He took one last look at Tails before he passed out, if Sonic's hand didn't slip off Tails' he wouldn't have known he was holding it.

For 10 long scared hours Tails, Amy and knuckles (who had angel island secured so he could be gone for a while) sat in a quiet waiting room, waiting for the red light above the door to go out.

Tails couldn't handle the pressure in the room anymore and went to stand outside for a little while.

It had been sunny the past couple of days, but right now it was grey, and rainy. The hospital had a large outside deck for patients and visitors, but right now the only people who were standing outside were four or five smokers.

Among them was Shadow, leaning on the iron bar fence which was just high enough for him to lean over.

Tails quietly came to stand next to him but Shadow didn't seem to pay any attention to the little fox whatsoever.

Whether it was because Shadow got annoyed or just because he thought Tails could use one he offered Tails one of his cigarettes who didn't hesitate to take one.

Shadow handed him a lighter.

"When did you start?" Tails asked while staring into the beyond, standing next to Shadow.

"I guess I could ask you the very same thing. But the question is why." Tails snickered. "I only smoke when I'm really stressed out, which doesn't happen too often. Well, it was rare before Sonic wound up in this place... "

Tails took another drag and blew the smoke into the air towards the clouds. "I wonder how Sonic looks now... I heard he doesn't look like himself anymore since they cut his back quills and with the leg... By the way, it it all gone or..."

"They amputated his leg from his right knee down." Tails said softly. "But he keeps it covered, so I haven't seen it up close."

After they were done with their bad habits they decided to go inside. When they walked back into the waiting space they saw Amy leaning against knuckles who held his arm around her.

"I'm back." Tails said while Shadow walked into the room alongside the fox.

"Shadow? You here?" Knuckles asked. Amy looked up to see that indeed Shadow was also standing there.

"Why are people always surprised when I care?" Shadow said while taking a seat near knuckles and Amy.

After a while, the red light went out and they all couldn't help but hold their breath, Shadow included.

Sonic's orthopedic surgeon walked out of the operating room and assured them that the surgery was a success.

"Sonic's back is back in one piece. I don't think we'll need to open him back up for a long time."

Amy started crying again. She was just relieved that it turned out ok.

"When do we get to see him?" Knuckles asked while holding Amy closer.

"They just finished to stitch him up, he'll be brought to his room to wake up in 5 minutes. Wait for him there."

And so the four of them made their way to Sonic's room who got wheeled in just a minute later with an oxygen mask covering his mouth and he was laying on his left side. The first thing the nurse did was hook him up to the three infuses again.

"Excuse me, miss, but what are those for?" Amy asked curious.

The nurse finished putting the third one in place (the one in his neck).

"Well, in the one of the left wrist gives blood and plasma, the one on the right are minerals and nutrients since he won't be able to eat for a few days. And the one in his neck gives him a moderate dose of painkillers." She said, and after checking if the flow was right, she left the room, giving them their space.

Sonic groaned a little and tried opening his eyes. Amy took his hand and she felt a faint grip from the blue hedgehog. "Tails?" He muttered. "What? No it's me, Amy." Sonic's grip loosened as he tried to cover himself some more with his white sheets.

"How are you feeling, man." Knuckles asked.

Sonic rubbed his eyes, he was still drowsy because of the anesthetics.

"I just lay with my back open for 10 hours on end I have a bunch of weird liquids pumping inside of me and my leg itches but I can't scratch it since it isn't there anymore and the stitches on my back really hurt. But besides all that, I feel pretty good Knux" Sonic said with a faint smile.

Shadow liked his dark humor and let out an amused 'hmpf" making Sonic notice him.

"Shadow? He said surprised. Shadow inched a bit closer and gave Sonic a pat on his shoulder. "You just take it easy now."


	5. The hospital stay: just a few more days

Sonic was recovering incredibly fast, a few days later Sonic was already able to move again. Two of the three infuses were gone, he was able to eat real food again (something he had missed) only the boredom of being refined to one room with the routine of physical testing became a drag really quick.

For some reason Sonic couldn't figure out, Shadow and Tails tended to visit together more often.

One afternoon Shadow thought enough time has passed and that Sonic was ready for some questions.

"Sonic?"

"What is it Shadow?"

The black hedgehog had an expression of deep thought on his face. "I was just wondering... would you mind showing us your injuries?"

"Shadow!" Tails scolded. "What, I'm just curious, and..."

"It's ok Tails..." Sonic said softly with his head bowed down.

Sonic sat up and turned himself towards them. He kept himself straight by holding on to the handle that hung on the bed above his head. As he did this he uncovered his amputee.

It was creepy to look at, you could still see the healing stitches on the side of what was left of the leg.

Tails couldn't help but feel a tad disgusted by the sight. It just looked unnatural. Shadow reached out and actually touched the stump which made Sonic feel very uncomfortable.

Shadow picked up on this and stopped his touch.

After that he walked around the bed, Tails stayed where he was, he didn't want to see it.

A large vertical wound which trailed all the way down his spine was stitched up and the skin around it had a pale peach color, They had shaven the fur on his back for the operation.

Shadow took off his glove and ran the tips of his middle- and index fingers over the wound. It felt cool to the touch and despite the fact that it was partially crusted over, it was easy to run his fingers across in one slow move. Shadow may be genetically engineered, but he knew a thing or two about healing wounds. Sonic shivered by the sensation and pressed his eyes shut. He felt humiliated.

There was no way that Sonic would've let himself get touched by shadow before.

"This will heal soon, trust me."

Just as Shadow pulled his hand back Sonic's doctor walked in.

"Looks like you're making progress." He said on a pleased tone. Sonic didn't hear him come in and jumped up at the sound of the doctor's voice.

"I just came to run some quick tests..." The man said while walking over to the the blue hedgehog.

Tails and shadow were about to leave as the doctor said that it would just take a few minutes, and that there was no need to leave.

He scribbled down notes on his clipboard as he ran the tests.

Sonic already knew the routine very well. The doctor would bend him in certain poses and he had to say where he felt pain or discomfort.

Every time Sonic would hiss in pain Tails would jump up a little.

"Everything's healing faster then expected." "Told you." Shadow whispered. "If you keep this up you'll be able to leave in two weeks." Finally some good news.

"I'll be right back." The doctor said.

Sonic gently lowered himself down again, and moved the front part of the bed up so he could sit straight.

Before any of them could say anything the doctor walked back in while pushing a red wheelchair into the room.

"Would you like to go outside for a while?" He asked inviting.

Sonic didn't want to accept it yet, but he figured there was no point in delaying it...

The doctor instructed to lock his elbows around his neck so he could gently lift him into the chair.

When he was placed in the wheelchair Sonic just shifted in the seat and rubbed the armrests while the doctor put the IV stand in place. He took a look at Sonic and measured with his eyes if his arms could reach the wheels.

"A perfect fit." the doctor said as he got beeped. "Looks like my other patients need me, let me know how it went tomorrow, ok?" Sonic silently nodded while soundlessly saying 'sure'.

"I'm going too, see you guys later." Shadow said. "Bye..." Tails said with his hand raised.

As the doctor shut the door behind him, Sonic arched forward and buried his face in his hands.

"Sonic?" Tails knelt down in front of Sonic he could see tears stream down his wrist.

"Sonic, what's wrong?" But he didn't answer.

Finally... Sonic couldn't fight it anymore, he never cried as hard as he did then...

After a few moments Sonic was able to catch his breath again, he lowered his hands and fiddled around with the plastic tube of his infuse.

"I'm sorry, Tails... It's just that... well, it finally hit that this is how I will be living for the rest of my life." Sonic said blankly.

He took a deep breath and carefully brought his hands to the wheels, as if it was going to burn his fingers if he touched it. He flexed his arm to push himself forward but whether it was because he was still too weak or because he didn't want to do it he let his arms slide off the wheels. "You are still weakened, let me help you." Sonic didn't want to accept it, but it was a fact, if Tails didn't help him he'd get nowhere.

When they reached the balcony deck of Sonic's floor, Tails pushed Sonic to the Railing trough the orange and pink lights of the setting sun.

Sonic closed his eyes as he inhaled the crisp spring air. The strong cool breeze blew through his fur and quills and for a moment he felt like he was running against the direction of the wind.

But he was mercilessly punished with reality as he opened his eyes again.

He let out a sigh of disappointment as Tails already took a step closer.

"Don't, I'm fine... You don't have to jump up every time I take a breath." Sonic said rather coldly.

This hurt Tails,after all, he just wanted to help...

"I'm sorry, this is just going to take a while getting used too." Sonic said.

Tails grabbed one of the wooden chairs from a nearby table and joined Sonic to sit in the sun.

"Sonic? I've been thinking..." The fox said nervously while tugging on the cuffs of his gloves. "What is it Tails?"

"Well, since... this happened and all, and you don't really have a home to go to... I was wondering if... ehm... if you would like to come live with me in my house at emerald town."

everything became very silent between the two. Sonic had thought about where he would go after he healed up, but why hadn't he thought of Tails' house as an option?

Tails' hands still failed to keep still, but as Sonic reached out and held one of them Tails' gaze turned to his brother's eyes. "Thank you Tails..." Sonic whispered. Tails looked overjoyed as Sonic pulled the young fox into a hug.

**Author's notes:**

I'd like to thank you for already reading this far!

I really appreciate your comments, so please leave one and tell me what you think whether positive or negative is useful for the development of the story

_And for those who want me to show some mercy... let's say that I didn't even start yet._


	6. A new place to stay

_**Author's notes:**_

_Ok, this part may be a little tedious and long to you, but there's no other way to glue the two parts of the story together. So please bear with me._

Two weeks later Sonic was finally ready to leave the hospital.

Tails had been busy working on preparing his house for Sonic's arrival, while the blue hedgehog himself learned about how he could ride his wheelchair correctly.

Sonic was alone in the room that was his home for the past 2 months. Looking around, memories of Amy and Cream who always brought something nice when they came to visit, the day that the chaotix came over Espio showed him some simple meditation and relaxing exercises. Sonic felt silly when he first tried them, but he had to thank Espio later on, since it really helped dealing with the pain and Sonic found it easier to fall asleep at night.

Knuckles visited oftentimes too, but he seemed to be very unsettled by Sonic's newfound handicap.

His reaction to it all hurt sonic deeply.

"All set?" Shadow asked from the doorway. Sonic turned around in surprise, he didn't notice someone entering.

"I thought Tails was coming to pick me up." Sonic said.

"Tails still had some business around the house or something, that, and he doesn't own a car that big enough for your chair." Shadow said while swinging a set of keys. Sonic didn't reply.

"Well, let's go then." Shadow said while turning around and walking out of the room.

Sonic turned his head one last time before leaving the hospital.

Shadow's car wasn't all too shabby, a sporty black and red stationwagon. Not like he needed a big car like that, but he seemed to like it none the less.

"Ok, let's see here..." Shadow said while panning his vision from Sonic to the car.

When he seemed to have figured it out, he opened the front passenger's door and leaned forward to pick Sonic up.

As Sonic did a few dozens of times before, he locked his arm around shadow's neck as the black one very carefully lifted him from his seat and into the vehicle.

After Shadow finished folding the chair up and putting in in the back he came to sit next to Sonic.

"I didn't knew you could be so gentile." Sonic joked.

"Don't get used to it! Don't think that because you're crippled that it means I can't still kick your ass!" Shadow's hothead was one of the few amusements that Sonic had the past few months.

The drive to Tails' home was long and went by silently, Sonic just stared out the window. He was nervous and wondered what Tails had done to the house...

Sonic's thoughts got interrupted by Shadow pulling up in front of a two stories house which was built in between two other taller houses.

"Finally..." Shadow said while unbuckling his seat belt.

Sonic's stomach turned and he didn't know if he should be worried or excited.

Shadow took the wheelchair from the backseat and opened Sonic's carport. He leaned forward ready to pick Sonic up again. "I swear, if you say one more thing about this, I'll drop you so hard that you'll lose the other one as well." Shadow said menacing as Sonic looked away, that comment was just uncalled for...

"I'm sorry, ok. C'mon, let me help you out." Shadow said, he sounded genuinely sorry.

Sonic hated to be lifted in and out of that goddamned chair, but he had to face facts, he was and always would be unable to do it by himself again.

Just as Sonic was comfortable again, Tails stepped out and ran over to the two hedgehogs.

"Sonic, I'm glad you're here, thank you so much for driving all the way over here, Shadow."

"It was no big deal." Shadow said while closing the car door.

A few seconds of silence started to get on shadow's nerves. "I'm outa here." He said while turning around. "And Sonic, Take care."

There was something about Shadow's behavior that Sonic just couldn't comprehend; was he just amused by all of this or did he really care about him?

As Shadow drove away, Tails waved his hand but Shadow only glanced once at the blue hedgehog who could only stare questionably at the car in the distance.

"Let's go inside, there's much I want to show you!" The young fox said excited. Sonic shook the thoughts out of his head and turned around. "Yeah, let's go." He said calmly.

When they entered the house nothing much seemed to have changed since the last time he was there.

Tails' house was very simple and peaceful looking, lots of bright wood and sandstone tiles. The living area that lead from the door to the kitchen was almost one big open room with big windows looking out on the backyard.

The only think that bothered Sonic was the narrow stairway that would seem impossible for him to climb. "I've rearranged the furniture so you can pass and reach everything easily. Do you still know where everything is, Sonic? … Sonic?" Tails noticed Sonic examining the stairs and immediately started to smile.. "Don't worry about those steps." Tails opened a door next to the staircase and revealed what seemed to be an elevator box.

"It took me almost all free time I had, and I haven't slept for longer then 6 hours the past three days, but it was well worth it." Tails looked away bashfully as sonic wheeled closer and locked his arms around the little fox. "Thank you little brother..."

After the embrace Tails couldn't help but blush a little this was already the second time he called him his brother while embracing him.

"Well, let's give it a go!" Sonic said happily.

He rolled the chair into the elevator backwards and pushed the button while Tails closed the door.

As tails walked upstairs Sonic was already there.

"Well, Sonic, I had to change some things here." he said while lifting his arm to point at a certain door. "That's my study, it's where I design stuff, and work on smaller projects. I only ask you not to disturb me when I'm working there unless it's really urgent." Sonic nodded. "I understand."

"Over there is my bedroom, there is the bathroom." He said while opening a pale wooden door.

"I know you don't like taking a bath, but don't worry; There's a seat-shower in the corner and I've put everything in your reach." "okay then."

"And that's your room..." Sonic curiously came closer and examined the room. It was smaller then the one he had at the hospital and the colors matched the rest of the house, with a nice wooden floor and light green walls, a wide and short cabinet in the corner, a wooden comfortable looking bed a nightstand with a small lamp standing on top of it.

"I know it's not much yet, if you need anything to put in here, just let me know, ok?"

Sonic smiled and nod at the young fox and turned his chair to face him. "Thanks for everything Tails, but I'd like to be alone for a minute..." Sonic said with a smile.

"Alright, I'll see if I can fix ourselves some dinner, ok?" "Sounds good." Sonic said happily.

Tails smiled back and closed the door.

As soon as the door was closed Sonic's smile faded away.

He wheeled over to the window as he let his head down and once again tears escaped the corners of his eyes...

_**author's notes:**_

_ok THIS is the point where it becomes interesting, trust me, after this chapter the genre I put this story in is going to make sense! So keep on reading and notice my chapters getting longer and longer!_

_(btw am I updating too fast?)_


	7. Weight issues

"Is this what I'm going to be for the rest of my life? … Shadow was right when he called me a cripple. Oh stop your complaining, at least you're still alive!" Sonic didn't want to give in to his upcoming depression and focused on looking at 'the bright side' which became harder for him to do.

He didn't want Tails, or anyone else for that matter to pity him or feel sorry for his condition, it was bad enough that even Shadow started to act all sympathetic, and acting is what it was, at least Sonic thought so.

So he just acted like he accepted everything that had happened to him while in actuality the whole thing was tearing him apart on the inside.

And to push his self-image even more into the dirt, Sonic noticed he was gaining weight. Sonic could be quite the big eater and wasn't really concerned with picking out the healthy stuff.

He used to run a few hundred miles a day which kept his body (which he was very proud of) lean and athletic.

When he was alone he'd oftentimes poke around his stomach while cursing to himself.

Even the physiotherapist he was obligated to see at least once a week noticed he was getting a bit pudgy and subtly brought it to conversation at the end of one of the sessions.

"You are doing great, and by the way, are you watching your caloric intake?" The lady, said while Sonic just gave her a confused look, was it really that noticeable?

"Ehh, excuse me?"

"I was just wondering if you were watching your diet, you've seemed to have gained some weight, which can become problematic for someone with your condition." She said it in the most politest of ways but if there's one subjective that Sonic never thought people would use to describe him it'd be fat.

"I'll try to keep a watch on it..." He said softly.

Later that evening, Sonic was just sitting at the table poking at his plate. Tails' cooking skills were surprisingly good; and he was sure that the noodle dish would taste as good as it looked, but he just didn't want to eat it.

Tails looked over at him and noticed the strange behavior. "Something wrong?" The fox asked.

Sonic sighed and put his fork down. "I'm just not hungry..." He said blankly.

"Oh, ok, I guess." Sonic turned his chair away from the table. "Don't worry, there's nothing wrong, I'm just not hungry, trust me." Tails seemed to buy it alright. "I need some fresh air, I'm going out for a little while." Sonic said. "In that case, I have something for you!" The young fox jumped off his seat and beckoned Sonic in order to let him follow him outside.

Tails opened the garage door and walked over to something that was covered by a gray sheet.

"I've been working on this in secret, I didn't want you to see it until it was ready." Sonic just looked at Tails in confusion. What was he talking about anyway? Tails pulled the sheet away to reveal a red and blue hand-bike. "At first I wanted to build an electric one, but that still seemed a bit too early."

Sonic's face lit up, finally something that went faster then 5mph.

"I just can't thank you enough." Tails scratched the back of his head and blushed. "It was no big deal really. Why don't you give it a spin?"

The blue hedgehog looked at the new bike for a moment and then went to Tails. "You do know I can't get out of this chair by myself, right? Do you think you can lift me?"

"I can always try." He said while bending over. He's seen how it's been done hundreds of times before when he was still in the hospital.

Sonic held Tails who could barely lift him up. When Tails lowered sonic into the bike's seat he huffed a little bit too loud to Sonic's liking. "Am I really that heavy?" He asked sadly.

"I just haven't had enough sleep the past few days, don't worry about it. " The fox said while adjusting the bike. Sonic nodded and drove out of the garage.

"This thing's sweet, thanks again, Tails."

"I thought you were going somewhere?" The youngster asked. "Sure am! See you later Tails!" Sonic said while driving off.

Sonic decided to drive to the canal and back, which wasn't too long a distance. Sonic felt free again for the first time in quite a while and loved the way the wind felt in his quills even if he wasn't going at amazing speeds.

But suddenly he had to slow down because he was getting tired. He didn't understand it, he would run for miles and miles without a drop of sweat. But now he barely drove a bike around for 2 miles and already tired. He blindly blamed his weight for it. Just as he started to feel lightened up he was brought back down.

"It's hopeless..."

"I see you've got an upgrade." Sonic turned his head to see Shadow stand behind him with a smug-indifferent expression. "And I'm not talking about the bike either."

Sonic immediately folded his arms over his stomach trying to hide it.

"Hmph, you know, when I told you to take care of yourself I was being serious. They let you out of the hospital, supervised and advised by doctors and two weeks later you already gained six, seven pounds?" Sonic looked away in shame, trying as hard as he could not to let any tears escape his eyes, Shadow was dead on when he said he gained seven pounds.

"I'm sorry..." Sonic said silently.

"You don't have to apologize to me, you just have to think about what you want to do with your life at this point. And just because you can't think of anything shouldn't mean that you should neglect your body." There was to beating around the bush with this guy, always dead honest and didn't care who he hurt with it.

"And I wouldn't tell you all this if I didn't care." He saw a small tear roll don Sonic's cheek. "But you disappointed me Sonic. " Sonic jerked his head up to face the black hedgehog."I really thought that you were stronger then this." Shadow turned around and was about to leave. "Think about what I said..." He said before walking away without looking back.

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_**Author's notes:**_

_Ok it's been a few days since I updated but, hey, carnival only comes once a year and I needed the time to party and get drunk in silly outfits._

_Now about the story, I know you think you know the direction this story is going to take, but lemme tell you; you might be right, but this isn't going to be the mayor plot thread, and it's also not a ____meguphin (plot thread that only seems important in the beginning but is totally useless by the second act)_

___See you next chapter! _

___**(I love your comments, please leave a review and tell me how I can approve the story, I really appreciate those reviews!)**_


	8. Brother against brother

It was almost midnight when Sonic finally got back home.

When Tails saw him driving up the driveway he immediately ran outside.

The blue hedgehog dialed in the numbers of the garage door-lock as the young fox ran over to him.

"You've been gone for almost five hours, where have you been?" Tails said with a hint of panic in his voice. Sonic ignored him and drove inside. "Are you even listening to me?" He still didn't get a response out of the blue hedgehog.

"Sonic, I -" "You what? Do I have to justify everything I do?" Sonic snapped.

"I just want to know where you've been the past five hours, I've been worried about you."

"Oh, crap here we go." Sonic moaned, which irritated Tails to no end. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"That you are overreacting and that there's no need to be worried, I'm not a child!" Sonic said while raising his voice. "You're invalid, Sonic!"

"And you're not my fucking mother! I lost my leg and my back, and yes, I can't do everything by myself anymore but I don't want anyone breathing down my neck wile I'm busy doing things I can do." Sonic wasn't the one to swear and he never got angry at Tails before, who was deeply hurt by his friend's reaction. "But I just-"

"Just leave me alone!" Sonic screamed.

After that incident the atmosphere inside the house and the bond between the two had changed. Sonic stubbornly rebelled against any form of care that Tails, or anyone else for that matter, wanted to give him.

And because of this he avoided any situations where he'd need any help en thus forcing himself in and out of his wheelchair which started to take a toll on his weak back.

Sonic noticed he was more irritated and angry then he was sad about everything, with this he also cried less but because of his short temper he tended to have fights with Tails more often, sometimes it felt like they weren't even friends anymore.

Sonic also started to skip meals, and took the fight he had with Tails to his advantage as an excuse for not having to come down at lunch- or dinnertime. And thus Sonic started to lose weight even faster than he had imagined.

One morning, three weeks after the first fight, Sonic struggled getting out of his bed. Still refusing any help he crawled in and out of the wheeled seat by himself. But he felt his back getting worse, and the pain was almost too much for his body to take.

As he finally managed to sit down the pain got worse and he fought to catch his breath. Suddenly he remembered he still had some heavy painkillers from the hospital. With great effort he pushed his wheelchair towards the bathroom. Sonic never felt more glad that Tails put everything in his reach, the medicine cabinet included. While browsing through the many glass and plastic bottles and tubes Tails walked across the doorway but stopped to see what he was doing.

"What's going on?" Sonic shrieked and accidentally knocked a few bottles to the ground. A bottle of coughing syrup broke into shards as it hit the floor, spilling the sticky contents all over the floor.

"Tails, what are you doing here?" Sonic asked nervously. "I heard strange noises." Tails stepped closer and grabbed grabbed a towel to clean up the mess. While he was squatted down Sonic saw the bottles he was looking for, he quickly grabbed one of them and hid it inside his glove.

"What were you looking for anyway?" Tails asked calmly, hoping the hedgehog wasn't going to freak out again. Sonic nervously looked around, what could it be he was looking for. "The cough syrup, I think I'm catching a cold..." Tails stood up when he finished cleaning up the floor. "Oh, I'm sorry I startled you then, I'll pick up a new bottle from the store, don't worry." When the young fox turned around to walk out he suddenly fell down and shrieked in pain. He was only wearing socks, and it appeared he stepped into a glass shard from the broken bottle.

Tails sat down and took a look at his left foot, he noticed the white sock he was wearing had a spreading red stain and a small shard sticking out of his foot. He carefully slipped it off, but when he gently tried to pull the shard out, it hurt way to much, so he just took a deep breath locked his eyes shut and with some force he pulled the shard right out while screaming in pain. Sonic quickly wheeled over to his friend's side and laid his hand on his shoulder.

"Are you ok?" He asked softly on a concerned tone.

But the younger fox didn't reply he clutched onto the shard while trying to catch his breath while tears streamed down his face.

"Tails?"

"I... I'm ok, the pain is already fading a bit." He said while wiping the remaining tears from his cheeks.

Sonic noticed the wound was bleeding pretty hard and wheeled back to the medicine cabinet, almost forgetting his back was hurting.

He grabbed a bandage roll and a bottle of disinfectant as well a pack of cotton balls and put them in the sink.. Then he rolled back to his friend and offered his hand. "Come here." Tails didn't really know how to react, but he took Sonic's hand and lifted himself with his other foot. Sonic instructed Tails to come sit in his lap. Carefully he followed the hedgehog's instructions and pulled up his injured foot.

With one arm Sonic supported the kitsune's back while wetting a washcloth with water. "Press this on the cut."

Sonic pulled a cotton ball somewhat apart and put some of the orange contents of the disinfectant onto the soft surface of the cotton. He then started to treat the wound as Tails shivered in his arms.

When Sonic finished unreeling the bandage Tails could feel the pain fading away.

"There, that should do it..." Sonic said while stroking his friend's back. "Thank you..." Tails said softly.

"Hey, that's what big brothers are for."

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_**Author's notes:**_

_Phew; all in a day's work!_

_I'd like to thank you for reading and I give a big hug to all the people who already faved this story and me._

_You might also start to notice that everytime something goes wrong, something comes back together again. I guess I can't write all doom and gloom. xD_

_And to Ghostkid33; thanks for delivering feedback to every chapter I hope you had fun at New Orleans and I'll be delivering many chapters more!_


	9. In and out of control

Later Tails and Sonic were just sitting in the living room, while the tv announced the latest news.

"_Geologists say that this was the biggest storm that the mystic ruins ever endured. The local ancient temples suffered damage, but fortunately none of the on site archeologists were harmed."_

They showed the damage on Echidnas' pyramid temple and the wooden train platform was broken down. _"They expect a hard after-storm but it appears the biggest danger for the historic island is over. In other news-..." _

"Talk about timing." Tails said while getting up. "I have to go check up on my workshop, I kept many valuable designs and tools there, I have to go see what's left of it." He said worried.

"Right now?" Tails smacked his forehead, but Sonic didn't get any of this. "This is going to be a problem, I can't take you with me, because I'm taking the tornado-2 just in case the weather goes bad again, or if I have to take some things with me..."

Sonic rolled his eyes before turning his head away. "What?"

"You're talking about me like I'm a pet or something." Sonic said annoyed.

"Aw, 'cmon not this again. It's still too early to leave you alone for so long. You have to see that too." Tails said concerned. "It's been four months!" Sonic was already getting angry, he was convinced that he could take care of himself. "You've been out of the hospital for only a month, do you think that's enough? And I'm tired of you fighting me all the time." Tails gave Sonic an angry glare, Sonic let his head down and he was clutching the armrests of his chair, trying not to cry. "What is it now?" Tails asked irritated, it's not that he didn't notice the mood-swings, he just didn't know how to react to them.

"Do you think this is easy for me?" Sonic said with a trembling voice? "I've lost everything I am; first my leg, then my back, my freedom, I look terrible and the worst thing is that everyone treats me different now." Sonic paused a moment to take a breath, Tails stood powerless, what could he say? ".Do you remember the look on Knuckles' and Amy's face after my operation? Amy looked at me like I was going to die or something and Knuckles... he was just disgusted. The only one who doesn't treat me like I'm handicapped is Shadow..." Sonic had to stop there because the crop in his throat hurt too much and he just let his tears fall from his eyes while supporting his head.

Tails let himself slide down from the wall to the floor. The sound of Sonic's sobs hurt in his ears.

Eventually the room became quiet, but neither of them were inclined to say anything. After a moment of complete silence just as Tails wanted to say something the doorbell rang. Tails slowly pulled himself off the floor and walked to the door while limping with his cut foot.

He opened the door to see the black hedgehog standing in front of him. "Shadow? What are-"

"You asked me if I could drive Sonic to the physiotherapist because apparently he's been refusing to go?" "Oh, yes, of course, come in." Shadow followed Tails inside who noticed Sonic had gone upstairs. "What happened to your foot?" Shadow asked. Tails looked down at his bandage covered foot. "I stepped in some glass this morning, wouldn't be the first time." Tails said while obviously faking a cheerful mood.

"You sure have your hands full, don't you?" the hedgehog said while taking a seat. Tails realized there was no point in faking, Shadow was too smart to be fooled by this anyway. "I just don't know what I'm gonna do with him... I try my best to help him while giving him his space, but he still fights me every step of the way." "Well what did you expect?" Shadow said calm. Tails gave him a confused look. "What do you mean?"

"Well, Sonic has always been a free spirit going wherever he wants to go without any boundaries blocking his path. And now he's held back by his own limitations, did you really think he'd be just fine after he left the hospital? How naive..." Tails didn't want to admit it, but he never looked at it that way before. Shadow was right.

"And now I have to go to the mystic ruins to see if my workshop is still in one piece but I can't leave him alone." Tails was clearly worn out by everything and he was way in over his head. Shadow tried not to say anything but he knew this wasn't going to end well if he didn't step in. "Why don't you let me watch him for a while?" Shadow could kick himself why was he getting involved in this?

"You?..." Tails remembered what Sonic said about him, but he didn't know if this was a good or a bad thing. "Well, I guess there's no other way..." Tails said partially relieved.

Meanwhile Sonic was in his room staring out the window, thinking. He had taken some painkillers to deal with his back pain. His stomach was rumbling, he barely ate over the past few weeks and his fur was barely keeping his ribs from showing. Sonic liked the feeling when he ran his hand across his chest. He didn't really know where this feeling came from but keeping himself from becoming fat became his holdfast, it gave him a feeling of control, a feeling he didn't get that often anymore. That was also the reason why Tails couldn't know he was using the medication. He wanted to decide for himself what was good or bad for him.

After a while Sonic felt it was time to leave the small room before his thoughts drove him completely insane.

When he exited the elevator he saw Shadow and Tails sitting at the table. "So you finally decided to come down, huh?" Shadow said.

"What are you doing here?" Sonic asked confused.

"Well, Tails asked me to make sure you went to see the physiotherapist since you refuse to go when told nicely." Tails wished he could hit Shadow with something. Sure, it was the truth, but couldn't he have said it some other way?

"And if you don't like it, then there's even better news." The black hedgehog said with a slimy smile on his face. "What's that?"

"Well, since Tails has to leave for a couple of days to look after his things, I'll be staying here to make sure you don't accidentally kill yourself." Tails thought Sonic was going to snap, although he wasn't yet saying anything he just stared at the two with a shocked expression on his face. "It's not like that!" Tails yelled trying to keep his friend from freaking out, but he just smiled from the corner of his mouth while moving closer. "So you're going to try to keep an eye on me, heh." Shadow wasn't expecting anything else from the blue hedgehog; he wouldn't show any kind of weakness after their little talk last time. "You know, I try to behave myself around Tails because he's my little bro, do you think you can handle me?" Tails had never seen Sonic behaving this way. "For as far as I'm concerned you're going to be my blue furry bitch for the next five days. Besides, it's not like you can run very far." Shadow wasn't the type to show any mercy, nor was he going to act sensitive for Sonic's sake. While this verbal cockfight took place Tails was having serious second thoughts about letting Shadow watch over him.

"Are you ok with this Sonic?" Tails asked carefully. Sonic chuckled. "Yeah, that's fine. Let's see how long we'll last."

A few hours later Tails was all packed and ready to go. He showed Shadow around the house and showed him where he kept everything.

"Well, I guess that's everything. Are you sure the two of you will be ok?" Things already seemed to have cooled down between the two although Sonic actually didn't seem to care even one bit about who was in the house. "We'll be fine, now stop worrying about us, you're workshop seems a bit more important than this, no?" Sonic said.

Tails nodded. "Well, I'm off, see you next week!" A few minutes later he was ready for liftoff, he took one last look at Sonic and took off.

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_(**Author's notes:** I have nothing, make your own conclusions about this hahaha!)_


	10. worries of a meddler

"Well, I guess I guess it's just you and me then." Sonic said as cocky as ever, with his back turned to Shadow. "Drop the act, already." Shadow said while violently turning the chair around. He then firmly took hold of the armrests and bended over a little. "Shadow, what the hell?"

"You may be able to walk all over Tails, but I warn you now; don't try any of that stuff on me because you will regret it." The black one said menacing. Sonic was short on words and just stared at Shadow while he got back up. "Also, there's going to be some changes around here while I'm around... First, you will do what I tell you to do." Sonic wanted to respond in protest but got cut off before he could even take a breath. "Second, no back talk. Trust me, it'll get you nowhere." Shadow suddenly spotted the bottle shape in Sonic's glove, so he snatched his wrist and swiftly snatched the glove off his hand.

"Hey!" Shadow took out the small glass bottle and examined the label while throwing the piece of garment back at Sonic. "Also if you think you need to take these, I'll keep them for you." "What? That's my medication!" Sonic snapped back. "_These _are low-dose anesthetic pills, you know what happens when you accidentally take one too much? Your heart stops and you die." Sonic knew, but he didn't care, besides, he still had the other bottle hidden in his room.

"And that's about it. If you know what's good for you, you'll listen to me." Sonic just lifted his shoulders. "whatever." He said while shifting his view to the floor.

"Anyway, I'm not here to boss you around. And if you need to go further then you can go, just ask and I'll drive you there." Shadow was uncharacteristically nice all of a sudden and this kept Sonic on his toes.

Shadow's eyes trailed from Sonic's eyes to his body. "Well, you do look healthier, looks like the bike-rides have paid off." Shadow said surprisingly kind. "I, ehm, I've been losing weight almost everyday."

Sonic said kinda proud while rubbing his neck. But Shadow knew something more was up, he just didn't feel like addressing anything right now.

"Anyway, we missed your appointment so I'll try to reschedule for tomorrow." Shadow said while looking at the clock. "Whatever..."

The rest of the day went by without any trouble, but mostly because they kept out of each others way.

That is until 6 pm when Shadow went to the backyard to see Sonic who was laying in the grass basking in the sun. Sonic loved the early summer; it was warm and all the flowers were in full bloom.

Sonic opened one of his eyes when he noticed someone taking a seat next to him.

"It's nice in the sun, isn't it?" Sonic said while closing his eyes again. "I've never been a summer person." Sonic wasn't surprised. "Winter then?" He guessed.

"Too cold, I like fall the best I guess." Shadow said while laying down on his back, but rolled over to his side because his back quills was keeping him from laying comfortable. "At least there's one advantage of having my back quills cut off." Sonic said.

Shadow scanned Sonic's body, he was in terrible shape. It was obvious to him that he's been starving himself. Also his fur was less shiny, but you wouldn't notice unless he was sitting in bright light.

Shadow didn't want to get even more involved in this, but he felt like he had no choice, he had to address it... "You know, I'm amazed of how fast you lost that weight, did you start exercising or did you just stop eating all together?" Sonic's heart skipped a beat in panic, what could he say? "What? Do you think I-"

"Starving yourself isn't the way you know..." This couldn't be happening, Sonic was not going to let the last thing he had control over taken away from him. "Shadow, seriously do I look like a 12 year old girl to you? I'm not wasting my time with that stuff." Sonic said while holding a very convincing grin on his face, and Shadow seemed to take it.

"Guess you're right." Shadow looked up for a moment and huffed. "This sun is getting way too hot, I'm going back inside."

When Shadow was gone Sonic put one of his hands on his chest, he was not going to lose control over this.

The black hedgehog let himself plump of the couch with a sigh. "Fucking liar..." He murmured.

He didn't get it, why was he so concerned about this anyway? He wouldn't have cared before he lost a leg... Maybe he just pities him, who cares anyway? Shadow lighted one of his cigarettes from the pack he had lying on the coffee table and started thinking;

"I'm already too involved in this, I'll just let him and Tails fight it out."

Some time later Shadow opened his eyes, apparently he fell asleep. He glanced at the clock, 8pm already. "Good morning." Sonic said sarcastically, Shadow didn't even notice the blue hedgehog sitting 3 feet away from him.

"Why didn't you wake me up?" Shadow asked. "You just looked so cute when you sleep." Sonic joked while ducking from a pillow. And before he knew it he lost his balance, slid off the couch, and fell on his back with a painful yelp. "Sonic, are you okay?" Sonic didn't respond, but when shadow got close enough, Sonic slammed the pillow into the black one's face. He obviously wasn't too happy about this. "Damn it, Sonic, I thought you were hurt!" He yelled. "It was just a joke, okay." Shadow didn't respond but knelt down and got a hold of Sonic as he lifted him off the ground. He was way lighter then last time, and Shadow had no problems in feeling his bones trough is fur.

Sonic got nervous, he could feel Shadow's hand shifting against his chest and prayed that he would put him down before he noticed anything.

Shadow sighed and lowered the blue hedgehog into his seat. "Anyway, did you-" He said before being cut off by the phone ringing. "I'll get it." Sonic said while riding over to the other side of the room.

"Hello." He didn't even notice his voice was trembling a bit. "Hey, Sonic, it's me, Tails."

Sonic couldn't start telling him how grateful he was for interrupting Shadow.

"Hey, did your workshop survive the storm?"  
"Pretty much, some things need repairing though. I shouldn't take me longer then just a few days." Tails said while looking around. The small living area he sat in was had leaks in the ceiling just like the rest of the shop. The front gate was almost blown off and most of the windows were smashed.

"That's good news." Sonic said while tugging on the phone wire, he hoped everything would be fine, and that he'd be back in the morning, he didn't want Shadow to be there anymore, he would catch on way too fast.

"But could you give me Shadow for a minute?"

"Ehm, sure." He beckoned Shadow and handed him the receiver. "Hey." Sonic hoped he wouldn't mention anything, and just went upstairs.

"Hey, Shadow. I was wondering how Sonic is doing." Tails said subdued. "Why didn't you ask him that yourself?" Tails sighed. "Because I won't get an honest answer out of him."

This was true, it was very obvious that Sonic was keeping secrets..

"Yeah, I... I can't believe I'm going to meddle in this, but, something is seriously wrong with him..."

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_**Author's notes:**_

_Cheesus christ! Finally that pesky "error 2" thing is fixed so I can start uploading new chapters again!_

_Anyway, you have no idea how difficult it was to write this chapter._

_I want Shadow to act authoritative but caring at the same time. And the 'friendly' interactions between Sonic and shadow are hard to write without making it look...well, gay and, I don't intend of making them act 'out of character' and I hope that how I make the characters act are truthful representations. (considering what they're going trough right now)_

_Also, if I make spelling or grammar errors, please excuse me, I try to proofread everything, but keep in mind that I'm not a native English speaker. (I'm Belgian, I speak Dutch)_

_I'd also like to thank the people who put this story to their favorites- and watchlist. I also appreciate the people who faved me as an author. And also to Ghostkid33 who provides feedback on every chapter I write, thank you!_


	11. confession time with legal drugs

Meanwhile, Sonic nervously sat in the upstairs hallway, unable to calm himself down. He was trembling and found it difficult to breath. Sonic noticed Tails' bedroom door was open. He didn't know why, but he went inside.

In contrast with the rest of the house was this room quite messy. The window was creaked open and various items cluttered the floor. This was more like the fox he knew, Tails never struck him as a tidy person, he probably just keeps the place neat for Sonic's sake.

The hedgehog noticed a smile tugging on the corner of his lips while he scanned the room.

Some photographs stood on top of a shelve chest, he didn't even remember when most of these were taken.

But these were the good times, when saving the planet every once in a while was the only worry on their mind. All the places they have been, all the adventures they had. Maybe he just had to hold on to these memories, perhaps losing his leg and the strength in his back isn't the end of his life... Besides, he's still young, and as long as the people around him remain sane this shouldn't be such a problem after all. He thought these things while he felt his eyes watering up again.

Suddenly something caught his attention; a half full plastic medicine bottle stood on the nightstand along with an empty glass.

He carefully maneuvered his way around the clutter as he managed to reach the conspicuous item.

'Nervilan', the name of the pills didn't tell Sonic anything. But the label read; "Use to calm nervosity, reoccurring panic attacks and actively lowers blood pressure. Side effects may include-..." Sonic couldn't believe Tails was taking sedatives... But on the other hand, Tails did get a lot to endure the last couple of months. He always had the habit of caring too much about others, forgetting about his own needs.

Sonic felt like a jerk, he made Tails feel terrible and forced him to take drugs to deal with his problems instead of cutting him some slack from time to time. Then he noticed an open drawer on the nightstand. He carefully pulled the knob and almost slapped a hand to his mouth in disbelief of what he saw; the drawer was filled with empty bottles. There must've been at least 20 of them. How long was Tails taking these anyway?

While thinking this trough, the blue hedgehog got scared for some reason and put the bottle in the drawer and left the room...

"What do you mean? What's wrong with Sonic?" Tails started to panic. "When was the last time you saw him eat anything?" Shadow asked calmly.

"I don't know ever since we started fighting he refuses to... Wait, are you saying that...?" Shadow let out a sigh. "He's starving himself, he's skin and bones..." Tails almost dropped the phone from his hands, why didn't he see this happening?

"And another thing."

"What?" Tails said with a trembling voice. "Did you know he was taking heavy painkillers?" Shadow said calm. "Well, I know he has them, and he was instructed to take them if his back hurt, but I don't know if he's actually taking them... But I don't think that's a problem, just keep an eye on it for me, ok? Bye..."

"Will do."

When Shadow hung up he brushed his hands trough his quills, he decided he was going to not to meddle any more in this, Tails knew now, so Sonic would be dealt with.

Tails put the phone down and pulled his knees to his chest, the musky smell of old caravan interior and garage air stuck to his fur and the draft caused him to shiver a little.

He just tried so hard, why was Sonic doing this to himself? Tails grabbed into his bag, took one of his Nervilan bottles and chucked a few of the white pills into his mouth. "Just what am I going to do?" As he said this to himself he already started to feel light headed.

He grabbed the folded blanket from the nearby table, and let himself fall back on the camper couch/bed and covered himself to keep warm.

When Tails closed his eyes The sensation came a bit faster then usual, he could feel relaxing waves go trough his body as if he was laying in the surf of a beach. Starting to twitch but his body became numb soon after, and his senses got muted down he felt calm and his body was tingling. It felt like his heart was beating at light speed, but in reality it was barely beating at all.  
After a while the room started to spin and the dizziness caused Tails to grab onto the flat thin mattress like he was going to fall off if he didn't. Tails' breathing got faster and he started to groan softly as tiny beads of sweat dripped down his forehead. It felt almost magical to him, no worries, no thoughts even, just the sensation of the high.  
He then started to laugh softly. In this euphoric state he squirmed on the bedding turning himself on his sides and eventually his body calmed down while laying on his stomach with the blanket wrapped around him tightly. Still feeling a bit buzzed he closed his eyes again and managed to get some sleep.

The next morning Shadow woke up on the sofa, while stretching out he saw Sonic was sitting outside in his wheelchair. The black hedgehog let out a sigh as he lowered his arms. He got to his feet and walked over to the yard. But kept standing in the doorway for some reason.

Sonic was just sitting there limply with one leg pulled up to the seat staring into the distance. Suddenly he let his head drop and his shoulders started shaking, he was crying.

Shadow walked over to the weeping hedgehog and laid his hand on his shoulder. Sonic didn't jump up or anything like that, he just shivered at the touch and reached up to hold Shadow's hand who didn't knew how to react since Sonic never acted like this towards him before. But even though he was far from accustomed to this, he moved a step closer and took a firmer hold on the other one's hand.

They didn't say anything, not like Sonic was capable of saying even a word right now, and Shadow just wanted to be of comfort for him and although he didn't know why, he just wanted to help him.

Sonic squeezed his friend's hand tighter. "thank you... Shadow..." He said with a trembling voice. His head felt like it was going to explode as he tried hard not to break down completely in front of his former rival. But the comfort he got from this was overwhelming. Suddenly he started to hiccup, trying to keep the sobs in, Shadow picked up on this and squatted down to look Sonic in the eye. Shadow's expression looked calm and caring, he felt genuinely concerned for him, even though he didn't understand why.

"Let it out..." Shadow said softly, and before he knew it he was locked in Sonic's scrawny arms who cried like there was no tomorrow.

Shadow needed a second to figure out what was going on, but he then he put his arms around the blue one's body. Shadow was afraid that if he squeezed too had he would break something of Sonic's skinny frame, so he held one arm on his back and the other one on the back of his head under his quills..

Sonic felt himself calm down and noticed Shadow was hugging him back. He never noticed Shadow smelled so nice, a bit like cinnamon. His fur also felt really soft, since it was slightly denser and perhaps a tiny bit longer then his own. He just closed his eyes and enjoyed the moment.

Shadow wasn't paying attention to things like that and just hoped he calmed Sonic down who gasped a bit when he felt Shadow talking a firmer grip on him. Another lone tear fell from his eyes as he felt calm again. They slowly let go of each other as Sonic shivered a bit.

Sonic looked over to the cherry tree just a few feet away, Shadow got the hint so lifted Sonic out of his wheelchair and placed him against the tree for back support.

"What's wrong?" Shadow asked while taking a seat in front of Sonic..  
Sonic swallowed, he didn't know why he was crying all of a sudden. "I don't know, one moment I'm just enjoying the sun, and then I just..." "Just what?"

"Do your thoughts ever scare you?" Sonic asked. For shadow this was indeed something he could relate to, he had his own demons he fought off long ago. "They used to." He admitted. "Are you?" Sonic looked down and put a hand on his leg. "I sometimes think that my speed was all I am, that I tried to save the world just to make myself feel needed. And now that that's taken away from me... I'm nothing, I have no purpose anymore..." Shadow knew this feelings all too well. "And... and sometimes, I think that it would've been better if I had just died that night..." Sonic didn't cry this time, he didn't feel anything. Shadow couldn't believe his ears, Sonic was thinking suicidal thoughts? "Do you ever... hurt yourself?" Shadow asked.

"What? No! I mean, what are you talking abou-" "Never mind, forget I said anything."

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_**Author's notes:**_

_see; this is what I was talking about when I said it's hard to write the more sensitive interactions between the two hedgehogs without making it seem gay and out of place. _

_And for the record, I have nothing against male shipping, many interesting fanfictions and fan arts have been made to show that shipping two male characters together can be plausible and interesting. _

_Also I said in the notes of the last chapter that I don't intend on making the characters act out of place, so I'm not sure where I'm going with Tails' drug abuse yet. Maybe it'll be a subtle plot point or a major story arc; who knows._

_Just stick with the story and I promise to keep it interesting. _

_(ps: I'm planning on wrapping this up before it becomes a drag and long winded. I just don't want to run out of idea's halfway trough just to turn to overused cliche's and make it lame and stupid. So I wouldn't expect anything more then 6 chapters or so...)_


	12. sub chapter: Voices in my head

_What are you still doing here?..._

"I survived, remember?"

_You did, didn't you? … _

"I just told you."

_The world has no use for you anymore..._

"I know."

_Then... why are you still around...? _

"Who are you?

_Answer my question... _

"Why are you asking me this?"

_Answer it!_

"I don't want to hurt Tails any more..."

_Aah, the best friend... he wants you to leave too, didn't you know...?_

"Tails? Why would he-"

_You're causing him nothing but pain... and he turned to pills to ease it..._

"He wouldn't want me to leave because of it..."

_Because if you stay, he will accidentally put an end to it himself..._

"What do you mean?"

_He takes more of them every day..._

"You're lying..."

_You're crying again, since that unfortunate day none has passed without tears..._

"Stop it!"

_You even got Shadow to start wasting his time on you..._

"Shadow?"

_He's getting tired of your games as well. He already knows too much..._

"I trust him..."

_You're giving away our secrets! _

"I told him about you..."

_But he doesn't know about me... I'm always here, I'm the only one you can trust..._

"I know, maybe I should just go... I'm wasting everyone's time...

_And then everyone can finally carry on with their lives..._

"Carry on...with their lives. Without having to care about me...

_Tails will be happy again... He'll finally start living again._

"What about the others?"

_They turned their backs on you long ago, just when was the last time you heard of them?_

"What?"

_They have forgotten about you; Amy's no longer interested, knuckles is disgusted-_

"Stop it..."

"_You brought it up! Don't blame me if you can't handle the truth!"_

"Go away!"


	13. Dawning silence at last

Everyday the voice became clearer. The random noises he heard became words and became full sentences soon afterwards. Sonic didn't even know if the things he heard were real or not, it was like an ill-willed clone of himself was talking to him.

When there was silence from the outside, the noise started in his head. He probably didn't even remember what silence was...

Every time the voice became meaner and more menacing. From comforting and caring words telling him to hold on to berating verbal pummelings encouraging him to give up on himself in a matter of weeks.

Sonic just wanted to be alone again for a while. Away from all the noise and his problems, he just wanted to feel at peace again.

After months of barely coping with the situation he ultimately gave in to his true state of mind. He locked himself in his room and refused to let Shadow, or anyone else for that matter, inside.

Shadow didn't get it. Last time they talked Sonic was finally able to let it all out, he finally opened up to someone who understood the situation. He tried to reason with the blue hedgehog once, but after almost an hour of discussion and almost losing his temper he decided to let it be. If this is what he wants, then why should he care anymore?

No one is changing his mind, and tomorrow Tails would return home. Shadow wouldn't explain a thing, he was done with Sonic and if Tails wanted to help out so badly, then let him take care of it because Shadow had enough of the twisted games that Sonic played with him.

Meanwhile at the mystic ruins, Tails was almost finished a day early. Knuckles had traveled down to the ruins to see how much of his heritage was still in tact after the storm. When he found Tails fixing up his workshop he reckoned that the least he could do was help out a little, besides Knuckles enjoyed some manual labor once in a while.

It was a beautiful day and the workshop was as good as new so they rewarded themselves with taking the rest of the day off from duty, and just relax outside. "Thank for helping me out, Knuckles."

The red echidna raised an eyebrow. "It's no big deal, what you do for Sonic, now that's an accomplishment." Tails remembered what Sonic said about Knuckles' reaction; he refused to believe that he'd stopped caring.

"Don't you want to see how he's doing?" Tails asked. Knuckles didn't know what to say. Sure, he wanted to know how Sonic was doing and all but he didn't feel comfortable with the thought of Sonic being crippled. "It would mean the world to him... He fears you might have abandoned him..."

Knuckles sighed, did he even have a choice? But then he got an idea. "Why don't you bring Sonic here? You know I can't leave the master emerald unguarded for too long, and now that Eggman is out of the picture I'm afraid that someone else might try to get their hands on her if I leave her." Tails didn't know what to think of it. "Besides, some fresh air will do him good."

Knuckles was right, considering Sonic's mental state it would do do him some good to get out of the house. "Ok, when I get home tonight I'll ask him if he wants to go. On one condition..." Knuckles raised an eyebrow. "That you come with me for a day. He might not want to go if it's just me asking. I'll secure the master emerald for you." Knuckles thought it over for a second and agreed with Tails' terms.

Later that day Tails got back home with Knuckles with him, Tails wondered how Sonic and Shadow held out the last few days.

After parking the tornado 2 in the garage he and Knuckles went inside and found Shadow sitting around with a concerned look on his face.

"Well, I'm back." Tails said. Shadow didn't even notice them coming in and jumped at the sound of the fox's voice.

"How's Sonic?" Shadow didn't say anything and made his way to the door. "I tried to be of help here, I don't know what made him act up, but he's locked himself upstairs and refused to talk to me since."

"Maybe it was something you said? You know how quickly Sonic's put off." Knuckles said.

Shadow threw an angry glare at the echidna. "And since when do you care? We didn't hear a thing of you after the operation!" He shouted. "I'm here now ain't I?" The black hedgehog simply pushed him out of his way, afraid that he would do something to the guardian if he stayed any longer. He glared one more time before walking out, loudly slamming the door shut behind him.

Tails wished Shadow was wrong, but in the end he had to agree with him, Knuckles shouldn't have left so soon...

In silence he went upstairs with Knuckles following.

Sonic's head felt like it was going to burst, he wanted the voices to stop telling him to give up. Tears continually streaming down his face. He could barely breath, his throat and chest hurt and this time, it didn't stop. It just kept on hurting. "Go on... do it." Kept sounding in his ears.

But he tried to resist. "They're right there..." Sonic opened his eyes and noticed the anesthetic tablets bottle standing on top of the cabinet. He remembered what Shadow said about them; "You know what happens when you accidentally take one too much? Your heart stops and you die."

Sonic reached out for them but pulled his hand back quickly.

"Do it... It'd be better for everyone if you'd just disappear..."

Sonic just yelped. Maybe the voices were right. Everyone would benefit from it if he just left.

Slowly reaching out for the bottle; the voices still didn't shut up. "That's it... 'cmon, grab it, you know you want it..." He held the cold glass in his hand staring at it.

He pressed his eyes shut and visualized how everybody would do after this... They might be sad, they might even miss him a little, but in the end they just had to admit that it was better this way...

Sonic popped the bottle open as tears continued to fall from his closed eyes. He could hear the tablets ticking against the surface of the glass, it was almost deafening to him.

Tightening the grip he had on the bottle, he chucked his head backwards and threw the pills into his mouth, swallowing each and every one of them.

Suddenly his breathing became even harder and he felt his heart racing. The droning sensation in his head became louder, as he fought against the gag reflex of his poisoned stomach...

...

The pure feeling of ultimate freedom... before fading away into the dark.

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_**Author's notes:**_

_Ok, first something about the last chapter; It's an experimental chapter, I just wanted to really get into his head without having to worry about any settings or things like that, just the conflict between him and the voice in his head._

_**Anyway!** What's going to happen now, huh? Shadow officially walked out on him and knuckles finally came to see him after all these months..._

_Yeah, I'm not a hero when it comes to writing exciting suspense, am I? haha_


	14. Breath us back to life

Tails and Knuckles stood in front of Sonic's bedroom door as one of them knocked the door. "Sonic... I'm back..." they heard nothing from the other side. "'Cmon Sonic, I didn't come all the way from Angel Island for nothing did I?"

Then they heard a loud thump coming from the room, and the floor shook a little. Tails shrieked as Knuckles knocked down the door rather impulsively.

Tails ran into the room and just screamed at the top of his lungs. Knuckles ran in and grabbed Tails' shoulders as he became aware what they were witness off.

Sonic had slid off his bed, and knocked his wheelchair over, but it looked like he just fell from his chair. There was a thin layer of foam on his lips and his peach skin was pale. Knuckles threw his gloves off and pressed two fingers against Sonic's artery. "Call an ambulance! Now!" He yelled at the young fox who ran downstairs and in his rush even fell down the last six steps. Violently pulling himself from the floor he grabbed for the phone and dialed the emergency number with shaking hands and tears in his eyes.

Meanwhile, Knuckles had put Sonic on his back. He didn't want to do this, but he didn't have a choice, he closed his eyes and locked his lips around Sonic's as a great sough of air was pushed into the blue hedgehog's lungs. He'd stopped breathing so Knuckles breathed for him while pushing on his chest with quite some force.

"Come on, Sonic! You were stronger then this!" He yelled while repeating the process over and over again. Tails Ran back upstairs and found Knuckles pumping air into Sonic's body. Tails couldn't do anything but watch as the red echidna desperately tried to bring him back to life with tears erupting from his eyes. "Don't do this to me, Sonic!"

Then they heard an ambulance pulling over outside. Tails ran back down and opened the door. Knuckles still sat next to his friend as three ambulancemen ran into the room and took over. They checked his pulse and immediately put a plastic breath-pump over his face while strapping him onto a stretcher.

When doing this they shook the glass bottle out of Sonic's hand that rolled against Knuckles' foot. He picked the conspicuous item from the floor and examined it thoroughly. "Anesthetics? He shrieked, he may not know much about modern medicine, but he knew what these pills were...

Then it finally hit them... "Sonic didn't fall..." Tails whispered. Knuckles ran over to the amulancemen who finished strapping Sonic down. "He was holding this." He said anxious. One of the men took the bottle from his hands and put it in his pocket. "Thanks, this will be helpful." He said before carrying the stretcher down with his colleague.

Knuckles turned back to Tails who collapsed into his arms. "Tails! Please, stay awake. We have to go with Sonic!" Tails slowly snapped out of it and ran downstairs, Knuckles following closely behind him.

"Only one person can drive along with the ambulance..." "You go, I'll follow with the Tornado." Tails said. Knuckles nodded and got on..

He took a seat and held Sonic's hand firmly while he teared up again. "Why did you do this..." He whispered.

Suddenly there was a monotone bleeping noise and everyone jumped into action. "We're losing him!" One of the men said while being handed an MED device. Someone else started turning the buttons and a high beep sounded as the metal pads charged up.

"Sixty volts... Clear!" He said while releasing a high electric bolt into Sonic's skinny chest. "No response, going to Seventy... Clear!" Knuckles found it hard to look at Sonic's starved inanimate body limply pulsing to the shocks. He just didn't want to lose him... not like this...

After three shocks, the rhythmic beeping of the heart monitor was back as they arrived at the hospital, but the fight was not over yet.

They quickly wheeled Sonic to the IC room. Knuckles and Tails were instructed to wait in one of the waiting rooms.

They both kept quiet... It was a different kind of silence then the last time they were there... This time Sonic was there because of his own actions. The words that the paramedics used haunted their minds. Words like; critical, danger zone, overdose... suicide.

Tails couldn't take it anymore he just had to say something. "He... he tried to ki... oh, god... He tried to kill-..." He couldn't even say it. He sank to the floor and sniffled and Knuckles rushed to his friend's side. "It's not your fault... At least you were there for him..." And so he broke down as well while they both rested in each other's arms.

"I'm so sorry, Tails... I'm so sorry..."

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_**Author's notes:**_

_Welcome to act three!  
A small chapter, It just didn't fit at the end of last chapter and with the beginning of the new chapter that I'm writing..._

_And now Knuckles is in the picture! How is Sonic going to react when we wakes up? How will they act toward another? Will things take a turn for the better of for worse? you'll see... you'll see..._


	15. Give ear unto my prayer

The doctors did all they could to bring the blue hedgehog back to life, but this was easier said then done. Getting his stomach pumped was one thing, but because his body was weakened by the abnormally fast and heavy weight-loss it would take a miracle to help Sonic recover from this.

After 5 hours they finally managed to get Sonic's heart beating steadily but he was still breathing with the help of a machine. He nearly slipped into a coma, but they were just in time to get his heart pumping and his lungs breathing to prevent that from happening.

The two friends had calmed down and just waited for some news to come in. Knuckles sat next to the young fox while holding one arm around his shoulders.

Suddenly Sonic's old doctor walked into the room. "Mr Prower?" Tails looked up and recognized him immediately.

"Well, I normally can predict quite well how a patient is going to do when they leave this place... let's say I didn't predict any of this..." He said carefully.

"How is he?" Tails said sadly, West sighed. "Far from good; we almost lost him twice... It still baffles me how he survives all this." He said while looking at his notes.

"What did he do?" Tails had to hear it... he didn't want to, but he needed to hear it to believe it.

"He overdosed on the anesthetics we gave him for his back..."

"Accidentally or intentional?" Tails didn't even look at the doctor at this point, he just stared into space as his questions were being answered.

"He took about twelve of them at once, so I think we can say that... It was intentional. Sonic attempted suicide." Knuckles felt his heart skip a beat, Tails remained calm and let it all sink in for a moment.

"We keep him unconscious for now, you can see him if you want..." Tails nodded while knuckles walked over to them.

The guardian was afraid to go inside, but he wouldn't let anyone know. He carefully walked into the room with a heavy heart.

Sonic laid limply on his back with dozens of wires and tubes dangling from his body. His face covered by an oxygen mask and a bunch of different devices making loud noises and bleeps, keeping the hedgehog alive.

Knuckles didn't understand what most of these things were and his general confusion towards technology didn't help either.

Tails took a few steps closer as he took his lifeless friend's hand. "Please come back..." A single tear ran down his cheek.

The guardian inched closer as he joined Tails by Sonic's side. "Why..." He whispered. Tails never saw knuckles act this way before today. The brave echidna guardian appeared so small and afraid.

"Mr Prower? A nurse asked while walking into the room, the both of them looked up, so the nurse went to Knuckles. "Can I ask you to sign here please?" Knuckles gave the lady a confused look. "I mean, you are his brother right?"

"What? No, I... I'm not. He is." He said while pointing at the younger fox. "But, you're a fox and-"

"Brotherhood is not always based upon genes..." Knuckles said wisely.

Tails took the clipboard from the nurse's hands as he signed the hospitalization form like last time. And his jaw just dropped at something he never expected to see written down.

"What is it?" Tails couldn't utter a single word so he just pointed at the name; Sonic Prower...

This made Sonic officially his brother.

Later that night Tails was back home, Knuckles went with him.

Tails sat limply in the living room corner with the lights dimmed when he suddenly noticed bright flames in the corner of his eyes. He slowly walked outside to find knuckles sitting at the tree surrounded by candles and burning incense under the starry night sky.

Knuckled had asked him if Tails had this somewhere, now he knew what the candles and all were for... Sort of.

The fox curiously walked outside and watched the guardian with fascination who muttered strange words in some kind of ancient tongue while making subtle gestures with his bare hands in the smoke.

After a while he noticed Tails standing there and beckoned him to come closer. "Were you...?"

"I was praying." Knuckles said with a faint smile on his face.

After seeing one of his deities together with the spirit of Tikal, a young woman from his clan, he started taking the spiritual part of his culture quite serious.

"I prayed for Sonic almost every day..." Tails never knew this side of him, neither did he even expect for him to even have this spiritual side.

"Who do you pray to?" Knuckles smiled blissfully at the question. "Ancient gods, but also to my ancestors. They've been guiding me all my life... I never knew any family, and being the last one of your species isn't really comforting either. It just helps with the loneliness at times." Under normal circumstances Knuckles would never talk about this so openly.

"What do they say about Sonic?" Tails asked with a creaky voice. Knuckles sighed. "I don't know, one day I feel he's going to live, the other day he's going to die. I think they don't even know for sure..."

Tails looked down discouraged and Knuckles took his hands palms up and instructed him to close his eyes.

"सर्वर के सात अराजकता रहे हैं. ." Tails got nervous as the guardian spoke in foreign words.

"What are y-" "Ancient gods of times gone by, we ask of you your guidance... अराजकता है शक्ति, शक्ति दिल से समृद्ध है. Watch over our friend who dwells in inner darkness."

Almost like giving a sign of acknowledgment the wind started blowing. The strange language, the sweet scent of burning incense and wax under the stars and pale full moon felt almost magical to Tails.

"नियंत्रक एक है कि अराजकता जोड़ता है. His time has yet to come. Let the hero live."

Knuckles lowered their hands as Tails opened his eyes and silently stared at the echidna. "Knuckles..."

"I'm sorry if I scared you." He said softly. Tails didn't know what to say. He just unexpectedly got pulled into this. Tails didn't even believe in stuff like this. He looked at the stars above.

"Do you think it'll help?"

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_**Author's notes:**_

_Man this story is writing itself! This kind puts my other mediocre cliché stories to so much shame...  
it's been almost two years since I last wrote something. 'Before you came along' was my last.  
(don't read 'em old stories, your brains will just evaporate! Seriously, they __suck__)_

_Anyway, I've always liked the idea of knuckles being this mystic tribal expert. I don't know why... Besides, if you're going all the way to create spirits and gods that belong to this culture then I think it makes perfectly good sense that Knuckles would somehow believe in these things. Wouldn't it?_

_I also first planned on making the 'prayer scene' longer and bigger, but it would distract too much from the rest of the story, so I chose something more subtle and humble._


	16. surviving on an artificial high

The next morning Tails just sat in his room throwing his pill-bottle up and down.

Knuckles walked by the room and saw him taking a few. He just watched as Tails soon started to shiver and sway.

He then let himself fall down on his back and Knuckles immediately ran in and shook Tails by his shoulders. But he got pushed away. "Stop doing that..." Tails said with a slurring voice, nasty smile and his eyes half closed.

Knuckles scared away, this wasn't like Tails at all... He took the fox's' arm who immediately started to squirm and pull. "Don't touch me! You... asshole." He mumbled while trying to slap the echidna's face but he missed and fell against his chest instead. In his high he just went to lay comfortable against his friend and let out some doped laughs. Knuckles didn't know how to act, he was frightened by Tails' behavior. "Just what are you on, anyway?" Tails didn't answer he was too deep under the influence. He did, however, start feeling up to the red guardian.

"Go on..." Tails whispered. "Touch me..." Knuckles immediately jumped up and pushed the fox off of him.

"Get off!" he screamed. Tails' head started to clear up by this. "I- I'm sorry. I do some strange things when..."  
"When you're high? Damn it, Tails, did you forget what might've killed Sonic?" He said angrily before leaving the room.

A few hours later Tails was sobered up and found the courage to come down. He found Knuckles sitting in the couch with his eyes closed. "Are you sane again?" He asked. Tails said nothing but dropped a bunch of small bottles on the ground, some full, some empty. Knuckles looked down at the bottles and was just baffled about how many of them there were. "Just how long have you been-" "Abusing them? Three months, at least four every day..." He said shameful. "Why...?"

"It feels good to lose control, to lose touch with reality. It's frightening at first, but once you get used to the rush, you'll want to feel it all the time."

"Tails..."

"Don't... don't say anything... You're right, Sonic almost died because of an overdose... I'm not taking them anymore..." Knuckles didn't know what to say, Tails might've been addicted at this point. "I'm sorry about what happened just now. I can't control my actions when I'm drugged..." Tears started to flow again and Knuckles just felt sorry for him.

So he got to his feet and looked him in the eye. "It's ok, I understand."

Meanwhile, Sonic was close to waking up.

"So much noise... what's all this noise I hear?" His vital functions has stabilized over the past two days and although he was very weak, he was strong enough to regain consciousness.

"Focus..." Sonic listened carefully. He could make out some bleeping noises, grinding sounds of electric devices... this somehow felt familiar.

After a while it sank trough... he was being kept alive... why would they do that? Why...

Sonic slowly opened his eyes, his vision was blurry. He groaned and shifting between his sheets he then felt he was attached to all kinds of wired and tubes, even more then before. The pads and IV's hurt as he moved.

As he became calmer and more focused Sonic managed to get his view clear and was able to get a grasp on his surroundings.

The same windowless IC room he was in last time. The noisy machines, and strange liquids pumping into his arms.

"So you finally woke up."  
Sonic shifted his vision to see a nurse standing next to his bed. Sonic wanted to sit up, but he had a raging headache and was unable to move too much. "Don't strain yourself, you are lucky enough to be alive..." Sonic sighed, that was the entire point of it, he didn't want to survive...

Later that evening Tails got a call from the hospital saying that Sonic was alive and well.

"Really?" … "When can we see him?" … "Yes, I understand. Thank you so much." Tails hung up the phone and turned to Knuckles. "Well, what did they say?"

Tails took a deep breath. "He lives." Knuckles teared up and brought his hands to his face, it felt like a thousand pounds weight just fell off his shoulders.

"What now?"

Tails looked away. "He's awake and doing rather well, they told me, tomorrow he'll be transferred to the psychiatry wing... And only you and me have permission to see him."

"So... when are we going?"

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_**Author's notes:**_

_I just had to get this out of the way, I couldn't just leave Tails' side plot hang into the air like a floating balloon stuck to a high ceiling; it's there, you can't ignore it once you've seen it, and now you wonder how to get it down._

_I also searched for real effects of a sedative high (it's close to any hypnotic drug high apparently) and yes, this is how you may start to act if you take too many of them. So be weary kids, don't do drugs... _

_After Tails finding out about Knuckles, Knuckles finds out something about Tails. That, and Sonic lives! He's alive! Against his will... but still, he lives._


	17. psychiatric outburst

Sonic had switched rooms and now resided in the psychiatry wing. He was heavily monitored and was under constant video surveillance. The room itself didn't differ much from the one he had last time, the only difference was that the clean walls were painted in a pastel blue.

He lay in his bed, with his wrists strapped down to the mattress to keep him from hurting himself.

The voices in his head were thankfully reduced to the random noises and loose words.

When laying there, Sonic tried to find out how he got there. "I was alone, Shadow gave up and Tails was away... No, it must've been Shadow" His thoughts got interrupted by a doctor walking in the room.

Sonic didn't want to see anyone, so he just turned his head away and ignored the doctor.

"Sonic? Can I talk to you, please?" He said politely. Sonic just ignored him. "Your brother and friend asked if they could come to visit you.

"Tell Shadow to get lost!" He shouted.

"Shadow isn't the one who's joining your brother, Sonic." The hedgehog turned his head, but still avoided eye contact. "Then... who is it?"

Knuckles and Tails arrived at the mental-hospital wing and registered themselves at the lobby, as instructed. They were greeted by Sonic's new doctor.

"You must be Tails and knuckles, step into the office, please. He said while guiding them in.

The office looked impressive and modern. White walls and mostly metal furniture and hundreds of books neatly kept in glass chests.

They took a seat in front of the large desk with a knot in their stomachs.

"Ok, I'll just get straight to the point with this; we've been doing some tests to validate his mental condition and this is what we've found." Tails held his breath and prepared himself.

"Sonic has been diagnosed with both Anorexia nervosa, and schizophrenia."

Both Tails and knuckles remained surprisingly calm, they were devastated but appeared calm. They were prepared for the worst.

"Does this mean Sonic has a double personality?" Knuckles asked. "Heavens, no. schizophrenia in this case causes for him to have auditory hallucinations, he hears things that aren't there. It also comes with serious mood swings, depression, and unfortunately a death-wish." The doctor noticed the weary looks on their faces and decided it would be best if they just saw him. "I will have the written examination by the time you leave. Follow me please."

While wandering the hallways they heard all kinds of terrifying sounds, like screaming, yelling and crying.

They just hoped that Sonic wasn't as far gone as some people here.

"Here it is... Now, I want to ask you to be careful with what you say. Sonic is in a very unstable mental state anything could set him off." They both nodded and with held breath they walked inside.

Sonic was sitting tilted upward, still strapped up on the bed. They could clearly see what the starvation did to his once athletic body. The sight alone scared Tails to death.

Knuckles was hesitant to come in sight... he felt like this was his fault he was in here.

"Tails?" Sonic said sadly, he thought Tails was going to hate him for this... He would wonder why he was still here.

But he couldn't be more wrong, on the contrary, he ran over to the hedgehog and held him as close as the straps would allow and cried deeply.

Sonic was shocked, why was Tails doing this? Suddenly he saw Knuckles standing there...

"Knuckles?..." The red guardian cringed at the sound of his name but carefully joined Tails.

"You came back. . ." He whispered sadly. "Just too bad that this is what it took for you to start giving a shit!" Sonic's harsh words cut Knuckles really deep. "It's not like that!" Tails said trying to calm him down.

"He saved your life!" The room became quiet as they both stared at Tails.

"What?" Sonic looked at Knuckles, who just stood there petrified. "If he didn't reanimate you you'd-" "I don't want to live anymore! Don't you get it?" Tails scared away, how could he say that?

"I'm nothing anymore, I lost my speed, my independence, my self respect!" Sonic started to tear up as he continued. "I hear things in my head all the time, the noise, it won't ever stop! I'm always in pain and I'm dependent on you and I know how much that hurts you, and I know what you do to lower-the-pressure-..." Tails gasped, how could he know? "How did you..."

"You shouldn't leave your drugs out in the open like that... And I don't want to force you to do that anymore! Trust me on this, you're better off without me... just let me go..."

Tails shook his head while turning around and started running, Knuckles following him, leaving Sonic alone...

Knuckles managed to catch Tails outside the hospital doors. He sank to his knees and just stared at the ground.

"Tails! What are you doing?" Knuckles asked. "I'm going to get him out, knuckles... Sonic is going to run again!"

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_**Author's notes:**_

_Just what is Tails up to now?_

_I've researched a bunch of mental conditions it took me almost 2 hours to find out what Sonic has (and I'm the writer!) It's schizophrenia and anorexia. Sounds like a wacky combination? Well, it's not as implausible as you might think. These two conditions go hand in hand often and one can be the result of the other if you know what I'm saying. _

_And yes, this story is going to be a longer then I thought... I already finished the next chapter (but you ain't getting it until tomorrow because it's still a draft.)_


	18. Healing starts tomorrow

Tails obviously had a plan, but told Knuckles nothing about it.  
When they got back home Tails went straight to his study. Since then Tails was working on his computer all day, and he barely slept a few hours a night anymore.  
Knuckles worried about him, what was he doing in there anyway?

He started praying more often, sometimes hours on end because he felt it was the only thing he could do.  
Sonic was considered stable enough to start taking therapy, despite the little spat he had with Tails and knuckles a few days earlier.

He was put together in a room with ten other starved patients from around his age; seven girls and three guys. The therapists that treated Sonic decided to let him follow individual therapy for his schizophrenia and group therapy to deal with his eating disorder.

Sonic looked at the others they were just as nervous and small like him.

The therapist took a seat in the circle and clicked her pen. "Good morning, before we start I'd like to welcome someone new to our support group; Sonic Prower.

Sonic couldn't believe his ears... Prower? He had told the people from the hospital he was his brother before, but he never thought that they would give him his last name.

"My name is Jay Walken, I'm the group therapist for this group. If there's anything you'd like to talk about you can always come to see me, ok?" The blue hedgehog nodded at the friendly lady.

"Sonic? Sonic the hedgehog?" one of the girls asked. Sonic smiled and looked down at the floor. "What happened to you? The world hasn't heard a single thing after you took down Eggman..." The therapist wanted to avoid any conflict. "Shana, do-" "It's ok..." Sonic said soft.

"After the battle I lost my super form and fell to the ground, I lost my leg and three spine columns in my lower back. I've been in a wheelchair ever since. Sitting down the whole time, combined with not getting the exercise I needed I started gaining weight. I hated my body, and I also noticed I lost control over most things in my life. I stopped eating after having a fight with my best friend, who I was living with. The weight-loss became my only sense of control... That's how I became anorexic."

Long days and even longer nights passed. Sonic's therapy wasn't easy, every day he had to justify his actions and attempted suicide, he had to explain the things he heard and it started to wear on him really fast.

Meanwhile, Tails was worn out but felt like this was going to make everything right again, he felt like an idiot for not thinking about it before.

He put a bunch of papers in a folder and ran outside his study.

"Knuckles; I've got it!" The echidna was sleeping outside in the sun when Tails' cheerful voice woke him up. "What's going on?"

"I think I found the solution to Sonic's problems." Knuckles shook the sleep from his head.  
"What? How?" "You'll see when we get there, now are you coming or not?"  
When they arrived at the hospital they immediately searched for Dr. West.  
"Tails? What's the matter?" He was clearly not expecting them today. "I have found Sonic's cure!" He said hopeful while handing him the folder.

West's eyes widened as he examined the papers. "This is amazing... But, do you think it's possible? There's only so much his body could take?" Knuckles still didn't get any of it. "Trust me, according to my calculations and research he should be able to handle this kind of operation."

"Can someone please tell me what's going on?" Knuckles shouted.

Tails smiled at him and handed him a finished design drawing. It showed Sonic's skeletal structure with metal parts going from the missing parts of his spine all the way to his right leg.

"Are you going to build a robot or cure sonic?" Knuckles asked sarcastically. "Little bit of both actually." Tails started. "we replace this part of the spine all the way up there with extra strong metal, it's should be strong enough to support his body again. And if we replace the right side of the hip, and what's left of his right leg with light friction resistant metal, he'll finally have two legs again." Knuckles still had trouble comprehending it, just the thought of being a third metal stakes and bolts sent shivers down his spine.

"If we then attach nerves from the metallic parts to the brain and let it run on the energy of the pumping heart-" "Like a biologic water pressure compressor! But then we'd need to treat the metal parts with-" "The metal is corrosion free and extra smooth, the blood will not stick on it, and neither will it clog up the passages."

Both Tails and Dr. West were exited about it and hoped Sonic would be too.

Knuckles found the idea going too far. Risking his life for this elaborate operation so they could replace natural parts with electronics?  
But he kept quiet about it, if this was the only way, then he'd accept it.

Sonic heard that Tails and knuckles were coming and prepared himself not to get mad at them.

The therapy was slowly but surely paying off, he started eating again, even if it was with a lot of protest. And since he still wasn't completely sure of his will to live, they still bound his hands at night, something Sonic really hated with a passion.

He was looking out the window when he heard the sound of the door opening. He took a deep breath and turned around to see them along with Dr. West.

"Doctor? What are you doing here?" The last time Sonic saw him was months ago. "I may have some good news for you. Tails?"

Tails handed over the folder to Sonic and explained what their plans were.

"So, what you're saying is that with all these mechanical parts I will be able to walk again?" Tails nodded and Sonic just stared amazed at the drawings.

"But it's a very risky and labor-intensive operation. Almost all bones of the right side of your lower body will need to be replaced and arteries will have to be moved."

Sonic didn't fear it... if this is what it takes to turn back into himself again, then he'd take the chance, it's not like he wanted to live like this anyway...

"I'll do it."

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_**Author's notes:**_

_Ok, it's not a day later, but I just proofread it on the buss and prepped it for submission._

_Sonic's still on suicide watch but things are looking up. But do you think he's participating with the therapy or just coping with it? Will he become a stubborn jackass again, or will he finally surrender to the people who care about him?  
And what do you think about Tails' plan? Will he succeed?_

_That and...  
You're 41 pages further then when you started reading! Holy crap! 41 pages all written from my head!  
(sorry if I'm making you weird out.)_


	19. denied plans and friendly ruinions

"What? Absolutely not!" Tails ans Dr. West went to see the supervisor to get permission for Sonic's surgery who wasn't easily convinced about this plan...

"The risk is too high. And I'm not putting a patient's life to danger because of some fox's pipe dream."

This bothered Tails the most, even though there were as much humans as there were anthromorphs, like him, some people refused to take him or his inventions seriously just because 'he's an animal'.  
This guy was one of them, unlike West who even tended to forget about the external differences sometimes.

"I'm telling you, if we don't do this Sonic will die just the same. He already attempted to kill himself once, if he hears that we can't operate on him he'll just do it again! We need your written permission to do this." Tails tried so very hard to get this jerk's permission but he just turned down every argument the fox presented him with.

"Look, I've seen his designs, the kit has some amazing talent. His inventions and idea's have also stopped Eggman countless times..." The supervisor thought about it for a second.  
"Warfare is not the same as medicine, boy. It's a delicate business and I will not have this experimental nonsense in my hospital! Now get out and take your ridiculous plans with you!"

With that they left the office. But Tails wasn't ready to give up yet.  
"If that idiot thinks he can get rid of me that easily..." Tails said determined.

Knuckles was waiting with Sonic outside in the garden of the mental-hospital.

"What do you still use that iv for?" Sonic looked at the standard attached to his wheelchair. "liquid nutrients... I'm not eating enough and I can't digest medication yet so they have me using this. I'm getting pretty sick of it too." He said while plucking at the tube attached to his wrist. "And they tie my hands at night with those stupid straps so they have to reattach this thing every day."

"why don't you just eat more?" Knuckles asked carefully. Sonic put on a nervous smile. "If it was only that easy... You're free to make your own decisions. I'm monitored every day, I can't do things by myself anymore and everybody decides what's right for me without even asking what I think of it. Keeping my weight low is all I have now. Besides..." Knuckles never knew that it was a control thing. "Knuckles... I'm sorry for what I said."

"It's ok, I didn't do the right thing either. But once you can run again we can forget all about this."

_Don't ever forget..._

Sonic suddenly froze up. "Sonic? Everything ok?"

_You don't actually believe this crap, do you?_

"Go away!" Sonic shouted while grabbing his head. It's been a while since the voices were so clear.

_He's the one who put you in here, without him you'd be free from this mess..._

"Make it stop..." He yelped while tears streamed from his eyes again.

Knuckles was panicked, what was he supposed to do?

_It's never going to stop!_

Sonic let out an ear ringing scream and started to shake violently. And before Knuckles was able to grasp the situation, two doctors rushed to the hedgehog and took him back inside.

Back in his room Sonic continued to struggle and shout for the voices to leave. Knuckles almost couldn't bare the sight of his friend being treated like that. When the two doctors finally managed to tie Sonic up again who kept on making violent thrusts and noise.

That's when Knuckles realized that he'd never be the same again.

The blue hedgehog moaned in pain as they injected him with strong sedatives. And short after he calmed down and looked into the guardian's eyes. He looked so hopeless and scared.

Knuckles couldn't take it anymore and left the room.

Holding back tears he leaned against the wall and let it all sink in for a second. When he could hear Sonic moan and scream again he walked away.

Later that day Tails walked inside his home carrying tons of tools and metal blocks. Huffing while putting it all down he saw Knuckles sitting on the couch with his face buried in his hands.

"The people at the desk told me you left already. Did he have to leave for therapy or something?" Tails asked while stretching out, that stuff was heavy.

"Ehm, hello?" Tails turned around to see Amy standing there. "The door was open so..." Amy was clearly upset about something.

"Amy? What are-" "Why did I have to hear from someone else what happened to Sonic?" She shouted with tears in the corner of her eyes. "I'm sorry but-" "But what? I'm suddenly not your friend anymore? Did you forget that I care about him too?" Amy shouted angrily.

"When did you put any effort in coming to see him? If you don't show your face here every once in a while you can't expect me to have you cross my mind when something tragic like this happens!" Amy looked away. "I was afraid that he wouldn't want to see me... I was about to leave or about to call countless times but I was afraid that Sonic wouldn't return my calls or send me away..." Amy started to cry and Tails didn't know what to do anymore. Knuckles felt ashamed, at least she had a valid excuse for not showing up...

Amy calmed down and caught her breath. Tails went to sit next to Knuckles and the girl just followed. "Who did you hear it from, anyway?" Knuckles asked.

"Well, there's this girl I know who knows this other girl who's sister in the same anorexic support group as Sonic is." She explained. "And she explained everything during their therapy. But when I heard he tried to kill himself I just..." Amy started weeping again, and Tails put his arm around her.

"Something else happened to him today..." Tails and Amy looked questionably at the red guardian.

"He got an attack..." He said blankly. "An attack? What, I mean how di-" Amy panicked, what attack? "Didn't they tell you? Well... Sonic's been diagnosed with schizophrenia, he hears voices in his head." Tails explained cautiously, Knuckles took over by adding; "He heard voices again and panicked, he looked so afraid."

Tails gave them both a determined look. "Don't worry, as soon as we fixed him up he won't ever have to be afraid again. I promise."

While Tails tinkered on his invention, Knuckles and Amy went to keep Sonic company at least once a day.

Sonic never knew how happy he could be to see her again, and they had their tearful reunion. Amy felt sorry for Sonic, but was instructed not to let it show in front of him, she did a good job at it, and slowly the four of them grew close together again, maybe their bond was stronger then it was before...  
But the occurrence of attacks as well as his refusal to eat kept them on their toes.

Tails was never as thankful for hoarding a bunch of tools in his garage as he was now.

For days he was working on the iron skeletal parts for Sonic. When suddenly he heard someone was at the door. Tails opened up to find Shadow standing there. "Shadow?" The Black hedgehog looked disgruntled as he tried not to look Tails in the eye.

"I heard about what happened to Sonic..."

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_**Author's notes:**_

_This is a heavy one, lots of things explained here._

_But Tails may be certain about helping Sonic with his invention, and so is everyone else for that matter, but he didn't even tell them his idea got denied yet...What if he doesn't get permission after all?_

_And about the 'racist' supervisor, I thought that if there are idiots who think this way about humans of different colors, then what would these people think of anthro's living among them? It's just a speculation, of course, but I think it's plausible that there are humans who despise them as much as they despise humans at times. (*cough* Shadow)_

_(Also a cute little side note, most of this chapter was written while listening to Dido's 'thank you' and 'what it feels like for a girl' by Madonna repeatedly, thought you oughta know...)_


	20. shadow returns with some good news

"Shadow..."

"It's my fault, ok. Mine and no one else's. If you need to blame someone, blame me." He still looked away. "What? It's no ones fault, don't be silly..." Tails said comforting.

"I'm the one who called him fat, next time I saw him his weight had halved and refused to eat anything anymore. When he told me his thoughts scared him, I should've known he was hearing things. If I never told him those pills would kill him he wouldn't have gone that far."

While confessing his crimes Shadow remained calm. He looked regretful but also very collected. "He would've turned out this way one way or another. One person can't cause all this." Tails said wisely.

"I mean, we couldn't handle it, Knuckles couldn't accept it, Amy feared it, it's all of us, we all made mistakes." Tails was right, it would be wrong to blame just one person for something that was caused by everyone. "I guess you're right..."  
He then noticed Tails' dirty hands and a pair of construction goggles hanging around his neck.

"What are you working on anyway?" Shadow asked. "I'm making something for Sonic, come and see." Tails was obviously excited about it.

Shadow was amazed, Tails had converted his basement into a steel processing workshop. It was extremely hot in there and bright down there.

Already huffing after a seconds he looked at the younger fox. His coat was much thicker and fluffier then his, how come didn't die working out here? "I've been in lava pits cooler then this." He said uncomfortable. "Well, a steel processing room isn't exactly going to feel like a fridge." Tails Said while pouring some molten metal in some molds.

"And what are you doing here?" Tails led Shadow to his drawing table and showed him his designs along with some already finished parts. "Amazing..." It did look hopeful to him, besides, he was a genetic experiment himself if anyone would trust the idea, it would be him.

Shadow felt his head hurting more with every passing second because of the heat and he started to swoon a bit. "You should go, you might faint." Tails said while guiding him out.

"Tails... Thank you... The things you do for Sonic are beyond amazing." Shadow wasn't the person to give compliments so hearing this from him gave Tails the courage to keep on working.

"But I should be going... I'm keeping you from your work." He said while turning around. "Should you ever have any problems... I'll be there for you." Shadow wanted to walk on, but he found his hand caught by Tails'. "Tails? What are-" "Thank you... Shadow." When Tails thanked him, it was like Sonic said it like he did when he first took his hand.

Tails felt the grip on his hand become tighter and Shadow looked hurt. He then let go and walked away.  
Tails didn't understand what happened.

Meanwhile Sonic received some good and bad news.

"Well, you've been trying hard and I know how hard it was, but you gained eight pounds since we started working with you, and your digestive system has recovered from both the overdose and the starvation.  
Sonic was glad he was getting better again, but the thought of gaining weight bothered him.

"But does that mean?" Ms. Walken nodded. "You don't need that iv anymore. This is the last time you'll use it." Sonic was happy, his wrist was sore and irritated from attaching it every day.

"See, Sonic? Everything's going to be alright." Amy said gladly. "good job, Sonic." Knuckles said while tapping his shoulder.

For weeks Tails worked on his project and perfected it to the smallest detail. He went to see Sonic every now and then, at least once every three days, and showed him his progress. It was a heavy, and dirty job, and lugging heavy steel objects and tools around all day in humid temperatures around a hundred and ten degrees was wearing on him. And after that, he still had to put the electronics in.

Tired and worn out, but after a whole month of non stop labor, it was finally complete.

Shadow turned up again, even though he still blamed himself for a big part, he decided to let the past in the past and that it would be best if he just came back, everyone else did, so why wouldn't he?

The next morning Tails and Dr West went back to his supervisor to propose the plan again.

When seeing the parts and being explained how they all work and where they were supposed to go, he just had to think it over again.

"So you are saying that this plan is foolproof?" "I didn't Say that Mr Clarkson, it's still risky business, but just think about this; there's never been an implant operation like this before. You would have green-lighted a whole new era of modern healthcare. Our hospital would be in all the history books..." West said.

"Hmm, I don't know..." "And I can assure you that no one will blame the hospital if anything goes wrong. I take full responsibility if anything should happen to him." Tails said determined. "Just give it a chance... isn't it our job to help anybody any way possible?"

After a few minutes of tense silence the supervisor sighed deeply. "It'll be an experimental operation, anything can happen, and we aren't responsible for complications. Also, Prower must have a complete list surrounding anything that could possibly go wrong with him during, after, and in between operations. Let's see if he still wants it then... And if he does, then I want an official declaration of personal permission." Tails jumped and teared up from joy. "You will not regret it sir." West said while shaking his hand. "Now get out of my office, I have more important things to do, and don't forget the papers! It's still an illegal operation if I don't have the necessary papers!"

A few hours later the two arrived at Sonic's room, and by lucky coincidence Knuckles, Amy and Shadow were all there. "And? What did he say?" Sonic asked, but Tails' smile told him all he needed to. "For real?" West handed him a pen and the papers. He needed to sign the last one in order to get permission. "Read them thoroughly, it's important that you know the dangers." The doctor said. "What dangers?" Amy asked panicky.

Sonic inspected the piece of paper, it was a vast list of things that could go wrong.

"This is one serious list, I mean; cardiac arrest, anemia, deep tissue damage, fertility loss, paralysis, brain damage, nerve damage, and that's just to name a few..." The supervisor's plan certainly worked, it was scaring Sonic off alright...

"Don't worry about it, you're in good hands..." Tails said confident. Sonic took a deep breath and with his eyes pressed shut he signed the paper.

Knuckles still didn't get it, why risk five pages worth of serious risks for this? But it was his choice so he just kept quiet about it and tried not to get noticed. The others seemed to be excited about it...

Then Tails opened an iron chest with foam patting on the inside, and revealed Sonic's new body parts. It was made from a dark gray metal, and it was obvious where these parts would go, Sonic had examined the designs countless times. "It's the same weight and size as your other leg, and the other things we'll need to replace have the same shape and improved qualities from the real bones. "How will it look?" Amy asked.

"Well, after we're all done we can patch the naked robotic leg with latex models with fake fur. If everything goes according to plan, it should be barely noticeable." Tails explained while poking at Sonic's anatomy to emphasize his explanation.

Sonic smiled contently by hearing that he was going to look like himself again.

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_**Author's notes:**_

_Ok,this is bad, I'm close to finishing one story, and I already have ideas for another!_

I'm not going to get any work done... ever...

_Anyway, something a little more lighthearted, let's call it a breather, you can start worrying again tomorrow!_

_(20 chapters! Holy crud!)_


	21. worries below the surface

Suddenly Sonic's therapist Ms Walken walked inside. "Oh, well ain't this place lively." She said. While looking at the colorful crowd. "Hey, Sonic, I've got some great news."

The hedgehog grinned at the young woman. "More good news? This must be my lucky day."

"Yes, this just came in, looks like tomorrow you will have your mental examination done over again, and it will determine if you can get off the suicide watch or not." She said with a smile. Sonic uttered a joyous "Yes!" as his friends started to congratulate him on his progress.

"So tomorrow you might already know the date of your surgery." Tails said happy.

Jade was aware of this, of course and winked at West, who figured out she planned the examination on that day on purpose.

That night Sonic didn't even care if his hands were bound. "I might even start missing this." He said while getting wrists tied next to his body. The hospital worker just laughed at his reaction. "Ha ha, I sure hope for you that this is your last night here." She walked over to the door and turned off the lights. "Just don't get overexcited, ok, good night."

While laying there he thought off everything that happened today. Maybe there was something worth living for after all...

"Do you still hear the voices?"

"Sometimes, but the medication and therapy helps me ignore it, the sounds become harder to hear every day."

Sonic was answering the questions, but he would be lying if he said wasn't worried. If he didn't pass, then he would be kept on suicide watch, and he would have to wait longer for the operation. He tugged on the cuffs of his gloves and answered calmly.

"Just relax, you've got nothing to worry about. Jade said serene." Sonic took a big breath as the questioning continued.

"Ok, Final question. Let's pretend that the operation wouldn't happen, something goes wrong, or it's not possible, would this hinder your will to live?" Sonic thought long and hard about this question. He's been asking himself this since the day he heard the plans.

"Perhaps it would. I hope to become the who I was before all this... Although I know that too much happened. I may look the same, but it'll never be the same. But now that I have all my friends supporting me again, I feel happy again." Sonic said while tearing up.

Jade wrote everything he said down, and nodded at the answers.

"Well, you shouldn't worry about that last one anymore. I believe that you are more then stable enough to handle this. But, you have to continue your therapies, and I don't want to see you denying food, alright?" Sonic nodded, he tried his best to keep it in but before he knew it tears were running again.

"Thank you..."

Later that day Sonic sat in the garden again, the autumn leaves started to fall from the trees and the cold wind blew trough his fur. Tails saw him sitting there and walked over with a terrible knot in his stomach.

"How did it go..." He asked cautiously. "I... I passed." Sonic said while turning his gaze toward his brother and before he knew it he was caught in Tails' embrace while autumn rain started to fall from the clouded sky.

Tails let go of Sonic and started laughing. The wind blew harder and Sonic just enjoyed the sensation. It was a long time since he last felt alive. It felt amazing...

After the rain started to pour the two of them decided to go back inside when thunder and lightning clasped above their heads.

Back inside Tails seemed afraid. He'd always been Astraphobic but the fear seemed to be inconsistent, it seems to bother his more or less depending on the situation he's in.

"Maybe they have a room left for you here..." Sonic said with a slimy grin. Tails gave him an angry glare. When suddenly the lights went out as the storm worsened outside.

Ms Walken walked by as she saw them staring out one of the large windows.

"This isn't safety glass, you shouldn't stand so close during a storm." She said and the two backed away. "Tails, I think it's best for you to go now, the storm is only getting worse..."

Tails looked outside with fright written all over him. "Is there something wrong?" Jade asked Sonic. "No reason to register him here or something, but Tails is something of an Astraphobe, thunder and lightning scare him to death sometimes." He said while she examined the young fox. "Well, I'm not going through this weather either, maybe it's best if you stay the night?" Sonic's room offered enough space for the both of them, and it would be good for him to spend his first night bondage free with someone else.

Tails didn't know... Sonic had told him what strange noises he could hear at night around here, but on the other hand, he was hearing all kinds of things wasn't he?

Still, spending the night at a mental-hospital sounded spooky to him.

"It's dangerous to go out alone... I suggest you'd stay." Jade said. Another thunderclap was enough to convince Tails at this point. "I'll stay." He said.

"Well, then I'll just put you on the list of-" "I didn't mean that! I'm not crazy! Eh, No offense Sonic." "None taken."

Jade giggled. "I didn't mean that, silly. We have emergency lists for visitors who can't make it home. It's just so the kitchen knows it has to prepare extra meals and what not." This sounded reasonable.

"Ok then, eh... sorry..." Tails said a little sheepish. Jade smiled at them and walked away. "'Cmon, I want to show you something." Sonic said while pulling him along.

While walking the hallways Sonic lead his friend trough a part of the hospital that he hadn't been before. No ominous sounds erupting from the rooms no eyrie vibe hanging in the hallways. It almost felt peaceful.

Suddenly the lights went back on as Sonic kept still in front of a door that had his name on it. 'Sonic prower' it still sounded weird to them.

"What is this?" Tails asked. "This, is my new room, I got it this afternoon." He answered while opening the door.  
It looked more like an actual bedroom now. With wooden floors, and furniture, a tv, a beanbag couch, large windows with marine blue cotton curtains. Actually, it looked more like a dorm room.  
Tails then noticed the bed on the other side. "Do you have a roommate?"

"Tonight I do." Sonic said while riding inside.

"I didn't know they put patients in rooms like this..." Tails said amazed. "This is a mental-hospital, not an insane asylum." Sonic said with a hint of annoyance in his voice.  
He then threw Tails a towel. "Thanks, I'm drenched." He said while drying his soft white and golden coat. Even though he was dried off Tails was still shivering.

"What I'd give for a hot shower right now." He said. "We've got scheduled hours for when we can use the shower rooms." Sonic said while pulling the blanket from his bed loose.

He then rode to the marine blue cotton couch.  
"Can you lift me out, please?" He asked politely. Tails didn't even notice Sonic asked him to do something that he's been avoiding for months.  
He just lifted his friend from his wheelchair, and put him on the couch. The blue hedgehog stretched out, laid back and relaxed. "Now, if you take that blanket you can get warm over here." Tails did that and snuggled up to his brother, trying to get comfortable. "Thank you, Sonic."

For a moment they just sat there, in a strange environment, just enjoying each other's company.

But the silence was broken by the door, it was Dr. West. "Hello, I have the dates for the surgery." Sonic's eyes widened in excitement. West handed the hedgehog a piece of paper. "We'll need about thirty-two hours. Three teams of surgeons, including myself, will switch turns so we can do the entire operation in one go."

This scared sonic off, thirty-two hours under narcosis while at least 15 different people mess around with his body? "Isn't that dangerous?" Sonic asked slightly frightened. "It would be more dangerous to wake you up halfway trough."

Sonic continued to examine the paper... "Just two weeks away?" Sonic felt his blood pressure rise as he thought about it.

"We need a lot of specialists, this was the only date that they were free. You should be glad, normally it would take months." Sonic swallowed a lump in his throat and tried not to think of the risks.

"Yeah... great, thanks..." He was obviously upset, but West didn't notice. "But I have to go, just try to prepare yourself, ok? Well, good evening, Tails." The doctor left as Tails noticed that Sonic was shaking.

"Are you ok?" The hedgehog didn't say anything. It was weird, just a few weeks ago he tried to die and now he's scared stiff.

"Will you be there?" He asked nervous. "I'm not allowed to..."

Sonic felt his heart sink as fear took over. Tails noticed this and got a hold of his brother's hand and arm and rested his head on his shoulder. "But don't worry, I won't ever let anything happen to you in there... Not if I can help it."

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_**Author's notes:**_

_Longest chapter yet, and once again books and informative websites helped me writing all the technical and medical hooba-jaba._

_What does Sonic's reaction tell you?_

_A nice in-joke (or what ever you call it) is that a friend of mine stayed in the same room as Sonic is now. She was treated for psychosis. Kimberley, wherever you may be I, still think of you (L)_


	22. I'm a little drunk and I need you now

It got late and he storm escalated outside. Tails had fallen asleep on Sonic's lap. He'd been thinking of his upcoming surgery for hours and it scared him like nothing else. He wasn't afraid to die... no, that isn't be the worst that could happen... He could come out more mangled than when he got in... And Sonic knew how surprised you could be about what you can live trough.

Tails shifted in his sleep, Sonic looked down at the golden ball of fluff that lay half on top of him. Sonic had no idea what he'd do if he should ever lose him... Now that he thought of it, how much pain had he caused Tails when he... a loud thunderclap and lightning strike made Sonic jump up, waking Tails.

"What happened?" He asked sleepy as a lightning bolt lit up the room for a second. Tails shrieked and Sonic put his ha. "It's ok... I'm here."

When the storm piped down for a brief moment Sonic carefully lifted himself into his wheelchair. "Where would you like to sleep?" He asked Tails. Right when the clouds started to rumble again. "Wherever you sleep?" He said awkwardly with a nervous smile.

Sonic smiled at this question. "Come on then..." Tails took off his shoes and gloves and walked over to his friend who already managed to get on the bed.

The tired fox didn't hesitate to get next to him. Sonic smiled at him while the fox got comfortable, when he stopped shifting he rested his head against Sonic's chest. Another loud clap caused Tails to hold on to his friend, who in return held him in his arms.

It surprised Sonic just how physical they had become. It was probably due to the fact that they got really afraid of losing one another.

"Goodnight little brother..." Sonic whispered quietly.

The next morning Tails was woken up by a ray of light shining through the drapes. He opened his eyes and noticed Sonic was still fast asleep.

He looked so peaceful to him.

Sonic groaned a bit and slowly opened his eyes. "good morning..." Tails said.

The hedgehog lifted himself a bit off the mattress feeling happy as he wasn't bound to the bed anymore.

An hour later Tails walked back in the room with a soft towel hanging from his shoulder. "Just what I needed." Tails said refreshed. He then noticed Sonic sitting in front of the large window, holding a sheet of paper. "Sonic?" No response...

Tails walked closer and noticed small wet spots on the paper. "Where you-" "No, I wasn't crying..." The hedgehog lied while wiping tears from his cheeks.

"What's wrong?" Sonic sighed and let the paper fall to the floor. "It's just going really fast... I'm barely sane again and they think I'm ready for this." He sighed, supported his head on his hand and pressed his eyes tightly shut. "Are you afraid?" Sonic jerked his head up and faked a smile. "No, I'm just happy that I won't be stuck in this hell on wheels for long..."

Tails seemed to buy it. "That's good. But I have to be going now, They'll call you for breakfast soon and I have to go home before Knuckles and Amy start to worry." Tails said and gave him a hug. "I'll be back this afternoon, ok?" Sonic nodded and Tails left.

As he closed the door Sonic bent over and continued to cry.  
He couldn't tell Tails he was afraid. He spent all his time and energy in making this foolproof and he would be so disappointed with him if he didn't go trough with this.

When Tails arrived back home he found knuckles and Shadow knocked out on his couch. And according to the number of beer cans cluttered the room it was obvious to him how they spent their stormy night.

Tails threw the door shut loudly causing the hedgehog and echidna to wake up, with the necessary moans. "When we agreed to stay at my house for a while, I wouldn't expect to find you two like this." Shadow groaned and opened one eye while holding his head when he suddenly noticed he slept on top of Knuckles' back. He shrieked away. Knuckles turned around and did the same thing.

"What did you do anyway?" Knuckles and Shadow stared awkwardly at one another. "Good god, what did we do last night?" Shadow said fearful. "You two got bored, started drinking and started acting like the two idiots you are." Amy said from behind. Knuckles suddenly got up and ran upstairs as fast as he could, pushing Tails out of the way. Shadow let himself slip on his back again, trying to make the room stop spinning.

"You deserve it." Amy said menacing. Tails just laughed, this was the last thing he expected to find.

"And where were you anyway?" She asked. Tails smiled at Amy. "Didn't knuckles tell you? I spent the night at the hospital with Sonic. The storm was too heavy for me to come home."

Tails explained. "How is he?"  
"He's off suicide watch since yesterday, and he'll be operated in two weeks." Amy started crying and threw her arms around Tails. "It's almost over..."

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Author's notes:

Short chapter, I didn't have much time today but I still wanted to give you guys something.

"It's almost over..." Or is it? Sonic surely doesn't seem to be all to confident about his case here...

(omygod, I can't believe I kept on spelling Tails' last name wrong. I've been browsing trough character bio's and saw it written right in front of me and I didn't notice! I fixed it in all chapters, and I'm sure that I'm never going to write it incorrect again!)

(btw, Knuckles and Shadow are getting quite friendly with one another aren't they? Just don't expect anything fruity! it was just meant to be funny. (even if I fail horribly at being funny)


	23. It's getting closer

Knuckles stumbled back down the stairs let himself fall on his stomach in front of shadow who just crawled to his original position, he didn't even care how fruity it looked, it was comfortable.

Tails looked at the two snuggled up to one another, it reminded him of how he and Sonic spent the night.  
It's very unlikely that they would call each other brothers anytime soon, but still.  
"Amy, are you coming with me this afternoon?" Tails asked. "Of course, it's not like those two are going anywhere today..."  
And right was she, for hours they just lay there sleeping off the hangover.  
After Tails and Amy left, in other words; when it finally was silent in the house Shadow and Knuckles started to sober up, and got off of each other.

"Now, what did Tails say about Sonic?" Knuckles asked while shadow lighted a cigarette. "I barely heard but apparently he's off suicide watch and they're going to operate on him in a few weeks, I don't know how many." He said. Knuckled sighed deeply. "I just wonder how Tails deals with all of this..."

"Humph, how did I deal with Maria's death? Or how do you deal with being the last echidna? We can't even answer this question for our own problems so what chance do we have to understand Tails'?"

Meanwhile Sonic was finishing up his eating disorder examination.  
Getting weighed every other day started to wear on him, he was still afraid that he'd get too heavy if he kept it up like this.  
"Thirty kilograms, that makes sixty-six pounds. You're close to getting your original weight back. Good job." Jade said.  
"And I heard you're got an operation coming on?" Sonic nodded. "Well, with your weight increasing like this, there shouldn't be a problem. So don't worry"  
Sonic didn't want to think about it, but still people refused to leave it alone...

A week passed and Sonic got more frightened every day. He suffered night terrors to just having someone mention it and its possible consequences sent ice cold shivers down his spine.

He had trouble sleeping and he started eating less. But because he faked enthusiasm and happiness so well, no one could guess that it wasn't his anorexia but his fright getting the best of him. Still his weight remained stable and Ms Walken didn't feel the need to address it so soon before his operation.

He couldn't let anyone know about this. If he did the surgery wouldn't happen, Tails would be disappointed, and he'd just wasted everyone's time.  
The voices in his head had also returned, despite the high doses of medication he got to help silence them.

This time they told him he'd die, or stay awake during the operation. All his biggest fears being recited as all at once.

The evening before the operation the whole bunch had come together on the balcony deck to support Sonic for what would come tomorrow. Even Amy and Cream seemed unafraid.

"Mister Sonic, do you really think that this will make you better?" "If everything goes to plan he should be his old self again shortly." Tails Said before Sonic could. This annoyed him and so he pulled Tails' arm and dragged him along to a place away from the crowd.  
"What's up with them?" Shadow asked Knuckles. "Huh? What did you say?" The echidna clearly wasn't paying any attention.

"Something's troubling you?" Knuckles sighed. "I'm just not sure about this operation. It's just so unnatural." Shadow gave him a nervous smile. "You're not a fan of unnatural creations, are you?" The black hedgehog asked, but he didn't answer. "But that's not all, is it?" the guardian just looked away. "I just... He's one of my closest friends, isn't it obvious that I don't like seeing him risk his life like this?" Shadow turned around and leaned over the railing, staring into the distance. "But I was wondering, if you're so detached to unnatural things... Then, what does that make me?"

"Sonic, what are you-" "Stop saying that I'll be the same again after this operation!" Sonic said angry. Tails didn't understand. "What do you mean?" "I mean that you want everyone to believe that as soon as I have my leg back that everything's going to be like it was before the accident. But it's not." Tails then suddenly noticed the fear in Sonic's eyes and stance. "Are you-" "I'm terrified, ok? And those voices keep on screaming that I'm not going to make it. You have to be there when they operate on me." At this point Sonic's eyes teared up. "Please..." Sonic grabbed Tails' hands and begged him not to leave him alone. Tails had no idea what to do, Sonic had always pretended to be fine and confident about this, and now he was crying in front of him again. The young fox eyes got misty, but he couldn't promise that he'd be there, as relative he wasn't aloud to be there. "I can't..." He said trying to keep himself from crying too. "But... I will try to stay as long as I can."

Sonic didn't sleep that night, he was too busy fighting off the voices in his head and he worried too much about what was about to just kept staring out the window, watching the sun slowly rise.  
His thoughts got interrupted by the door opening.

_It's time..._

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_**Author's notes:**_

_Another short chapter, but we're reaching the tensive climax of the story._

_Sonic admitted that he's terrified for the operation, what will he do? Aah, who knows how this all turns out..._

_**and to matrix:** I Don't remember where I first learned he was astraphobic, but it was a long time before I even knew there was a movie ^^  
And I never noticed how Tails is actually all pun... BUT I'll never misspell that name ever again, that's for sure!  
_


	24. about flesh and blood

When Sonic got wheeled out his room he looked around but he didn't see Tails anywhere...  
_He didn't even bother to show up _"Shut up..." He whispered softly.

"Sonic..." He jerked his head to the right and saw a familiar face, it was Tails, dressed in dark green cotton attire. "Why are you-" "I've got the call this morning, they want me to supervise the surgery after all." He said happily. Sonic felt his worries slip away, he wasn't going to be alone. "We'll be rooting for you too!" Amy said from the other side, joined by Knuckles and Shadow. "Don't give up now." The black hedgehog said.

Then they rode him into the operating-room, leaving the three behind. They lifted Sonic from his chair and onto the operating table And fear took over again. "I'm scared..." He admitted to Tails. "Don't be... I'm here now." A teardrop fell from his eyes as they covered his face with the anesthetics-mask. This time it was Tails who held onto Sonic's hand until he was narcotized. Tails took his position as they injected him with muscle relaxants. It was the beginning of a long thirty-two hour sleep.

It was hard for him to see his friend getting hooked up to all those machines and whatnot. When Sonic was all prepped, he was turned on his stomach and the fur around his spine and the right side of his hip was shaven.

When they made the first incision right on Sonic's spine Tails took a deep breath and focused on the job at hand, this was going to be harder to witness then he thought...

"OK, what are we going to do now?" Knuckles asked. They had been standing around the hospital hall for a while, not knowing what to do. "This operation is going on for thirty-two hours, I'm going to Cream's house and try not to go completely insane." Amy said. "Ok, see you later, Amy." With that she just left the two guys alone, and an awkward silence fell.

"So, what are you gonna do?" Knuckles asked, but shadow just stared off into space. "Shadow?" "Huh? What?" The black hedgehog turned his gaze to the guardian, clearly he wasn't listening to any of this.

"We should get our minds off things as well, just standing around will do no one any good." He said calm. "You're right... let's go..."  
Shadow and Knuckles were just walking around town, not headed for anyplace but at least they did something, even if it was in complete silence.

But something's been on the black hedgehog's mind since last night. He just didn't know how to talk about it to the echidna without sounding like a complete weakling. He wasn't one to be insecure about himself nor did he ever feel the need to answer for the things he does. Still, something started to gnaw on him since Knuckles brought it up yesterday.

He started to notice Shadow's look of deep-thought and decided to ask what was wrong.  
Shadow panicked, what could he say? "It's just that well, we've become quite good friends in the last couple of weeks, right?" Knuckles nodded, where was he going with this anyway? "Still, you avoided my question last night." The guardian scratched his head. "What question?" Shadow stopped walking and turned away. "You are so against Sonic's operation because it's against the natural flow of events, right? Then... what am I?"

Knuckles didn't know what to say; he didn't even think about that. But shadow was right, if he really is against all this technological disturbance, then why didn't he feel that way towards a genetically engineered alien hybrid? "I think I'm way more unnatural then Sonic's about to become, aren't I?" "I don't know, It's just that... You're right. I'm just being selfish. But, were you actually hurt by what I said?" This caught Shadow completely off-guard. "Humph, I couldn't really care less about what anybody thinks of it." He lied. "I just wanted to make you see how unreasonable you're acting towards all this." Shadow was lying, of course, but the ever so gullible Knuckles and seemed to buy it. "Guess I got kinda put in my place, huh?" Shadow gave him a smile. "Interpret it as you wish, I just don't want any trouble after the operation is done."

Meanwhile, the surgeons were doing their best to remove all the unnecessary bones from Sonic's lower body. Tails had prepared himself for this and tried his best to remain as calm as possible. He was working on the final details of the metal skeleton but just the sounds of the surgery were enough to keep sending shivers down his spine.

He just hoped that Sonic was going to live trough this...

He glanced over to the operation table... Big mistake. Sonic's body was cut up from his back to the right side of his hip down. It looked mangled and bloody. Tails quickly turned around again and felt cold sweat running trough his fur.

"Miles? Could we have your cooperation please?" He knew this was coming... He knew that if he'd taken the job as supervisor and that he was supposed to guide the surgeons so they would be able to connect the metal parts correctly. But he didn't know it was going to be this hard on him.

He took a big breath and turned around. "Sure, what do I have to do?"

They walked over to Sonic and Tails swallowed a lump. "It's about the arteries, we know they have to be moved to get attached to the metallic parts, but since we're not there yet, what should we do with them?" Tails blanked out his mind and grabbed all his courage and put on his mask before leaning over to the body.

"Span these tightly shut for now, Try to work around this one. I guess you know better then me why you can't touch that one. After that's done you can start taking out the rest of the bones. After that we'll start working on replacing the lumbar columns." Even though Tails had only studied Sonic's body for a brief period of time, yet he sounded like a trained professional; his confidence in this inspired the other doctors not to give up on this project and felt honored to be a part of this unique operation.

"Don't worry Sonic... I will help you..."

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_**Author's notes:**_

_Isn't it amazing how quickly Tails catches on? Anyway, what took me so long? Well, two words: Writers, Block, but I think I'll manage ^^ I know where I'm going with this after all. It's all in my mind and you just have to be patient!_

_It's just that characters (no matter what medium you put em in) have a mind of their own, they all have specific personalities and they all react differently to certain events. So I can be like "The plot's this way people!" while the characters are like "whatev, I wanna see what's over there..." And de-routes breeds side plots. (like the knuckles/shadow one right here.)_

_Also, I won't be able to update this week because I'll be on a mulitday school trip to Paris (ugh 6 hour bus drive) Just thought you oughta know. _


	25. organs and clockwork

Eleven hours had passed, so far there weren't any big complications. All of the unnecessary bones had been removed, and now the second team was working on putting the metallic parts back in. Tails was taking a break, he'd be expected to continue his work soon. He was trying to sleep in the night-shift dorm, or at least he tried to. In merely six hours he would work his magic and wire Sonic to the machine and then it'd be all over.

But much rest he didn't get, mostly he was just worrying about whether the other team would be ok. And they were, But his mind still wouldn't calm down.

When they called Tails in after merely four hours of rest, he was utterly amazed by how fast they were finished.  
Relocating the blood vessels and arteries while attaching the nerves was a messy and dirty job that took nearly seven hours.

Focused and determined Tails did his job. And after putting the last vessel in place, he gave the sign to unclench them to let the blood flow trough his new body parts. Small leaks were fixed and it looked like everything turned out alright. Until Sonic's blood pressure suddenly plummeted. There was a leak somewhere...

"It's the artery in his inner thigh." One of the surgeons said. And he was correct, blood mercilessly flowed from the tiny rip in the said vessel.

Sonic's heart-rate dropped drastically as they did all they could to stop the bleeding and to fix the rip.

But needless to say, this was easier said then done. Tracing down the rip was hard enough, after a somewhat messy procedure they managed to fix the vein and the biggest danger seemed to be over. "That's it team, let's close him up. The leading surgeon said."

Tails let out a sigh in relief, it was almost finished.

"Good thing this happened now and not in the middle of the operation, if he lost this amount of blood sooner..."

The young fox did all he could. He backed away and walked out of the operating-room while tugging the surgeon mask from his neck and found Amy, knuckles and Shadow waiting there.

"So... how did it go?" Tails took a deep breath. "It was a success..." The small group cheered, even Shadow seemed very excited.

"But I have to go wash up a little. I'll see you guys lat-" He got interrupted by Amy giving him a small kiss on his cheek. "Thanks for everything, Tails..."

A little while later, Sonic was taken to his old hospital room. Amy sat there in front of the sleeping hedgehog and stroked her fingers trough his spines. Knuckles was standing near the window, the sun was already setting. No one said a word, not a single thing until Tails quietly walked in.

"How is he?" Tails asked. "Asleep." Amy answered with a sweet smile across her face. Sonic looked so peaceful, like he already knew he was alright. He shifted a little and then tried to open his eyes.

The light was a bit too bright for him and he let his discomfort known by letting out an irritated groan. But after a few moments his eyes adjusted to the light and he was able to look around. Knuckles and Shadow came closer as Sonic regained full consciousness.

He was laying on his belly and he could feel the deep wounds of the incisions sting. "Hey, everyone..." He said with a creaky voice. "Am I in one piece again?" Shadow chuckled. "Yes, you can take it easy now."  
Sonic closed his eyes and suddenly touched the metal with his bare foot. The coldness made him jump up a little in surprise. Tears formed in the corners of his eyes. He finally had two legs again...

The young fox came to stand in front of him and Sonic swiftly grasped his hand and gave him a warm smile. "Tails... Thank you... So much..."

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_**Author's notes:**_

_That's right! I'm back! Ha! After fighting off the writer's block (seriously that thing just wouldn't budge and it kept eating all my food...  
I know, a ridiculously short chapter, but I just couldn't fit this part with the next, I'm sorry. I promise the next one will be longer!_

_Anyway, Sonic made it trough, he lives and the only thing he lost was a bucket-load of blood. Will this have any consequences for the future? Who knows? … I do!_

_Haha! I will be updating regularly again and don't worry, the next chapter will be coming very soon._

_Yeah! I'm back!_


	26. genetic emancipation

After a few weeks later Sonic was starting to move again. He also couldn't stop looking at his new robotic leg and couldn't wait to start trying it out.  
His mobility was low, but spirits were high as he didn't feel this great for almost a year now.  
As the first snow fell was just staring out of the window. Ever since his whole ordeal started he noticed he was starting to appreciate the small things.

Suddenly he was distracted from his thoughts as Tails walked in. "Hey, Tails." He said enthusiastic. "Morning, Sonic."  
The fox walked over to his brother while he took off his green jacket. He moved the sheets to take a look at the new limb. It was somewhat of a silly sight, but the patting would come later. "Any discomforts?" Sonic smiled. "It's perfect, I don't even feel it."

"Well, I was asked to take you with me. You're going to take your first steps today." Tails said while unfolding a wheelchair. "Just a little more time and I won't need to use that thing again!" The blue hedgehog said excited and glad.

A few moments later they arrived at the revalidation-center where they were greeted by a friendly trainer, A sporty looking white rabbit with very friendly looking eyes. "So, let's get you out of the chair." She said. Sonic's heart pounded in his throat. Was it real?

They both picked up Sonic and put him on his feet. While still needing support, he was standing.  
Then when he stood stable enough he finally was allowed to take three steps. It was heavy, painful and exhausting but he was moving again. It felt weird and a bit gross how the metallic leg knew exactly what Sonic wanted it to do. but at the final step he collapsed to the ground as his normal leg couldn't take the weight anymore.

"Sonic... are you ok?" Tails asked but he just limply hung there while he was supported by his arms. Then Sonic just started laughing. Tails didn't know what was going on, the trainer on the other hand had seen this happening countless times before so she just smiled and acted like there was nothing wrong.  
"I actually did it..." Sonic said happily when he could manage to catch his breath. It didn't matter to him that he couldn't go past two steps because at least he could do two.  
Tails and the trainer pulled him from the floor and back into the chair. "Ready to try again?"  
The whole morning Sonic was working hard on walking. But even though he kept on falling to the floor he wasn't close to giving up, on the contrary every time he fell down he got even more motivated to do it better next time.

For days and days he kept falling, couldn't make it past a few steps. He was exhausted and his muscles aced like they never did before. And even though Tails kept telling him he shouldn't push himself so hard, he just kept on going.  
Sonic was just sitting in that wheelchair, panting. His heart felt like it was about to burst and was obviously in pain.

Just when the trainer was writing down today's progress with Tails, he carefully stepped off, squatted down, and slowly rose to his feet.  
Suddenly Tails and the trainer noticed what he was doing, but didn't say a thing, they just watched. Carefully, he placed one foot in front of the other and with great focus he took one step after the other. All by himself he walked all the way to the other side of the gym which was about ten feet away before he nearly collapsed once again, but he supported himself against the wall. A few stray tears ran from Sonic's eyes. He did it...

And that moment marked the point of Sonic's recovery. Just walking those few feet was one of the greatest personal accomplishments he ever experienced. Every day he went out of his way to get the chance to walk. And nothing was stopping him.  
Everybody took turns to help Sonic out with his exercise. Although he preferred Knuckles and surprisingly Amy was also a great workout partner to him.

Amy was working with him on a certain day, and they were just taking a break. They were just sitting on the wooden gym floor. "You're making great progress..." She said a bit shy. "It won't be long before I can run again."  
"Sonic, I just wanted to thank you for being so nice to me over the past few months... I was so afraid you'd send me away but when I saw you again after all that time; I don't know. I just didn't want to you think I abandoned you."

Amy looked down but to her surprise Sonic placed his hand on her cheek and turned her head around to face him. "You deserve to be treated nicely... And actually, I can't believe I'm going to say this, but from everybody I missed during that period, I missed you the most."

Amy didn't know what to say so she just locked her arms around the blue hero who returned the embrace instantly. "I love you." "I know you do..."

Later on Sonic was just sitting in his hospital room with Tails. "So, how is Amy holding up as a training partner?" Sonic didn't answer he was just staring in the distance. "Sonic?"

The blue hedgehog sighed. "She's great to work with… Great motivation too." The way he talked about Amy made Tails smile a little. "She told me she loved me…" Tails wasn't too surprised by this. "She does that all the time." "True, but still… There was something about the way she said it…" Sonic felt a faint blush appearing on his cheeks and shook his head to shake the thoughts literally from his mind. "It's ok if you like her, Sonic…" The blue hedgehog was lost for words. "It's probably just the medication that makes me soft or something." He said with the fakes grin in the universe. "You're not fooling anyone, Sonic. At least, not anymore."

Sonic always felt ashamed when people reminded him of his past lies, did they forget he was mentally ill at that time? "

"I just never was that interested in dating anyone because I'm afraid it'll damage my freedom, but now that I've lost it, for the most part, I don't know, she appears… different to me." He confessed. Tails noticed Sonic was fiddling his hands, he was obviously nervous about telling him this.

"Don't worry, you'll figure it out."

That night Sonic was sitting on his bed while the snow fell. He watched as the white crystals fell towards the earth, bathed in the golden light of the streetlights. As he was sitting there in the shadows he enjoyed the silence in his head, the stinging pain in his back and legs gave him a comforting feeling, and his muscles were developing again so he wasn't just gaining weight he was getting his former frame back too. Everything turned out fine, for now, and who knows what the future holds. But he did know that he wasn't looking at the world with the same eyes.

Even though he wouldn´t have believed it, he was turning back to who he was before, and hoped to continue living his life to the fullest. Would he ever settle down somewhere? Who knows, he would always have a home with his younger brother, that was promised. And maybe Amy wasn't as much of an annoyance as he believed she was. Perhaps one day…

Knuckles had confessed to him how much he had been praying for his wellbeing and promised Sonic he would keep him in his prayers wherever he wandered off to.  
Shadow and him have become something special to one another too. They both didn't know what to call each other, but it was clear that Shadow never hated him as much as he always let on.

Slowly, day by day the moment Sonic had been waiting for was finally there. The sun was setting over the emerald fields and the spring flowers started to close.

Tails had proposed to put the finished patting on the leg, but Sonic chose not to, it was a reminder of what he´d been through and covering up what set him free somehow seemed wrong to him.

He stared at the open space as he inhaled the crisp evening air. He turned around to see his friends standing there.  
Sonic walked over to them and smiled warmly. First he went to Knuckles and locked hands. "I've been keeping you from your duty long enough now." The echidna just nodded and wore a gentile grin on his face. "You saved my life, Knuckles, I'll never forget that."

Then he walked over to Amy, he caught her completely off guard as he locked his arms around her waist.  
"You'll be my horizon…" He whispered in her ear. Amy didn't know what to say, her eyes turned misty as she returned the embrace. A subtle kiss landed on her cheek as they pulled away.

After that he reached out his hand to Shadow. "Can we just be friends instead of rivals?" Shadow smiled at the proposal. "Friends." Shadow had to think for a moment but tightly took Sonic's hand not a second later. "Fine, but that doesn't mean I'll back away from a fight." "I wouldn't expect any less of you."

Then he finally came to stand in front of Tails who was already in tears. "Tails… I´m sorry for everything I´ve done to you the past year, and I hope you can forgive me. And I´ve never been more proud to call you my brother." Sonic reached out for him and Tails immediately rushed into a tight hug. "Don't be away for too long…"  
"Don't worry, my home will always be here."

Then Sonic took a few steps back before turning around. One last time he turned his head and gave his friends his trademark thumbs-up and then speeded away like he used to.

At last, he was free again…

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_**Author´s notes±**_

_62 pages, 26 chapters, 4 months and 12 days. And it´s all over now._

_I could´ve lingered on about how Sonic´s complete recovery went but I chose not to, not because I'm lazy, but because it would've become boring and it would feel that I just wanted to stretch it out just for the sake of making it longer._

_I hope you enjoyed it, and let me know what you thought of it._

_Thanks for everyone who faved me and/or this story and keep your eyes peeled because I already have some new ideas for a next story._

_Good night everybody!_


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